Mold me each day, Lord, into what You would have me to be.

Mold me each day, Lord, into what You would have me to be.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Having confidence...Day 18

I had a really, really busy day yesterday and am almost ashamed to put my menu for yesterday on here. But the whole point is accountablity, so I will post.

B – Nothing
S – Nothing
L – Nothing
S – Popcorn
S – Weight Watchers Beef Stew frozen entrĂ©e (decent enough)

Workout – Tae Bo (Billy’s Favorite Moves) OUCH!

Okay, now that you have read that, I have to say that I absolutely do not condone missing meals, skipping meals, that sort of thing. I try to consistently eat five times a day. This is to keep my metabolism up so my body doesn't go into starvation mode, and by eating this many times I tend to not overeat at all. I stay less hungry overall. I was just really, really busy yesterday. My mom was here, we had stuff to do, and I didn't even realize until nearly 12:00 noon that I had not eaten yet. Then we had to rush to the store, and I was going to get something shortly after that, but again things were just too rushed. I came home and started trying to get the things done here that needed to be done, and ended up not sitting down until aruond 2:30 - I think - for a snack. I could have had lunch here, but I was starting to feel sick and just needed to hurry and eat. When I start to feel sick like that, then I don't want to eat at all, so I had to make myself eat the popcorn. Then I got busy again, doing more stuff around the house, and it got later and later. I knew I needed to work out, so I went ahead and did that first, and I think I ate supper some time after 10:00. It kind of all runs together now. I would have been fine to skip supper too, I just didn't want it, but I made myself eat it because it's NOT GOOD TO SKIP MEALS!!!

So, anyway, I'm down one pound today. But I will be eating normally again today, not like a bird!

What was really wonderful for me yesterday was that my mom said she could really tell now that the weight was coming off. She was so proud of me. It has been hard knowing that at the weight I started at if I lost 10 or 15 pounds you couldn't really tell it. So, now I'm at 23 pounds and it's starting to show!
I cannot say that I have not been discouraged through some of this time (as I have been working on this much longer than I have had this blog!), and I have felt at times like I wasn't doing any good. You know the feeling, "What's the use? I'm having the twinkie/cupcake/Butterfinger/Reese's/whatever..." But, the key as I've said before is small steps. And, like I said in one of my earlier posts, we have to remember that our worth does not lie in what we see in the mirror every morning. Our worth lies in Jesus. It is through his death and resurrection that we have abundant life and confidence, not because we have the best body or the best six-pack abs, or because we have the most beautiful face. What it all comes down to is that if we are the best-looking on the outside, but don't have Jesus in our heart and don't have our lives given completely over to Him, then we have nothing.

We are to be good stewards of what God has given us, including our bodies, but our bodies should never define WHO WE ARE! I have lived for too long being ashamed of who I am because of what I looked like. That is not living boldly for Jesus. I would go somewhere and just want to hide, hope as few people would see me as possible, and get back to my house where I was safe from people looking at me and what I had become. How could I expect to show the love of Jesus like that? And you know what else? I don't think badly of people because they're overweight, or anything else, and chances are, they weren't thinking that about me! And if they were, what does it really matter? My worth lies in Jesus.

All of our looks and the youth of our bodies is going to fade, so take care of yourself now, but know that all we will have in the end is Jesus. He will give us a new body and we will never be ashamed! Walk with your head held high, not haughty, but confident because we are "fearfully and wonderfully made"!!!


Michelle Bingham said...

AMEN sistah!

conleyclan said...

you should never be ashamed of what you look like you are a beautiful woman, you always have been beautiful!!! you are right though, we put to much power in other people's hands when all that matters is Jesus and what he thinks about us. i have a sermon where i talk about the fact that when God was giving Moses the instructions about the tabernacle there is so much effort put to what the inside of the tabernacle was to look like, beautiful fabrics, gold, specially sewn together and the outside was either goat or badger skin and neither of those are particularly attractive animals so that proves to us that God is more concerned about what the inside is than the outside. the sermon is better but my hands are hurting from typing!!!