Clay In The Hands Of The Potter

Is What You Want What God Wants for You?

2012-01-04T12:37:00.014-06:00

"Give in to the craving..." was the logo I saw on a sign today as I drove past a fast food restaurant. I immediately began to think about how these words seem to define the time we live in. There is so much focus on self-indulgence...on getting what WE want in order to be happy. The question is this; is what we WANT actually what we NEED? And furthermore, is what we want what God wants us to have?

We live in a culture of "Give me what I want, and I should have had it five minutes ago..." What we want is not always bad, but we have to evaluate our wants and desires to see if they are good for us and are things that will please God. This is a bit of a simple example, but we'll just start here: The sign I saw today was for some type of new food on the menu at this restaurant. Would it have been delicious? Probably. Would it have been satisfying? Most likely. So what would be the harm in it? I had not eaten anything all day so I did need food. But, this is where evaluation comes in. First of all, could I wait to eat until I went home? Yes. Secondly, was this in my budget? No. Thirdly, was I willing to sacrifice most of my weight watchers points for the day on this item? No. In the case of something like this, the decision is easily made using common sense and conventional wisdom.

But what about when it's not an item on a menu? What if it's something much less trivial than a fast food order? I won't give examples here because there are just too many, but we all have different desires, and you can fill in the blank with your own. In all cases of what we want, we must evaluate the cost, the end result, and sometimes the consequence. But most importantly, we must seek the Lord and hear His voice and His heart on every decision in our lives.

I've heard for most of my life to "Listen to your heart..." in order to find the answers. Well, here is the cold, hard truth - the heart can be deceived. Our heart is the seat of our emotions, and basing our decisions on "listening to the heart" can lead us down very wrong paths and cause us to make extremely wrong decisions. Our feelings can be very wrong at times, and it's imperative that we make sure that what we feel and what we think are lining up with the Word of God and with HIS heart. Feelings are often based on circumstance, and God can quickly change the circumstances we find ourselves in. You may have wanted something for years, and feel entitled to it, feel that you deserve it, feel that you can't live without it; but what will be the end result of getting that desire fulfilled? Will it bring peace and contentment, or will it just make you want more?

Psalm 37:4 says "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." The key phrase here is "Delight yourself in the Lord..." If we are truly delighting ourselves in Him we will find that our desires become very different. The focus shifts from "What do I need?" to "What can I do for others in need?" and "What do I want?" to "What do You want for me, Lord?" and from "This is something I deserve!" to "What can I do to serve?"

We will find the most happiness, contentment, peace and fulfillment when we are chasing after the heart of God, when our desires line up with His desires for us, and when pleasing Him becomes more important than pleasing ourselves.

Where is the "Undo" Button on this Thing?!

2011-12-02T14:53:00.006-06:00

Last week my son wanted me to play some games with him. We played Uno, checkers, something akin to Jenga, and chess. Now my son likes to play chess on the computer because before you make any move you can have the computer show you every possible move you can make, and it will not allow you to make a move that will put your king in danger by accident. Also, as if this is not help enough, there is an "Undo" button that you can use any time you don't like the direction the game is heading. Perhaps in moving your bishop to take the opposing rook, you don't notice the danger posed by the opposing queen who swiftly snatches up the offending bishop; no problem, just click "Undo". You could also call this one the "Easy" button.

While Jordan thoroughly enjoys playing this way on the computer, he was not prepared for what a game with a person would entail. Now, I am by NO means an expert chess player. While I do enjoy it, I am someone who is ready to move on to something new, not spend half of my afternoon plotting strategy that will ultimately not gain me anything of worth, besides bragging rights... So, we sat down and began to play, and he was really into it at first. But then, he made an unwise move and lost his queen. Immediately, he snatches up his queen and starts yelling "Undo! Undo!!!" After about two minutes of explaining to him that I am not a computer and this is what it's like to play against people, he gives up - not just on the fight to regain his queen, but he is now frustrated and just wants the whole game overwith.

As I sat there and thought about it, I realized that this is how we often feel in life. We mess up, we open our big mouth, we don't say what we should have, we don't do what we should have, we forget something important, we fall, we sin; and suddenly our mind is crying "UNDO!" However, in life, as in the chess game, there is no undo button. When we make a wrong move there is no going back. We can cry, we can grit our teeth, we can bang our fists, but we can't undo what has been done.

And yet, hope is NOT lost. It's not over!

Life moves forward at a frighteningly quick pace. And that, my friends, is the point... it moves FORWARD. We so often make the wrong moves on the board, and often lose important players (people or things) that meant so much to us; and no matter how much we might wish for it, we can't get them back. But we don't give up! We keep moving forward. We set our feet firmly on the ground, we look to the Lord for guidance in our next moves, and we don't look back. Paul said in Phillipians 3:13, "But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." We don't actually forget what is behind - we don't actually wipe our memory clean - but we change our focus to what is before us. Our memories, good and bad, serve to aid us in our daily walk. They help us to remember what is important, while not making the same mistakes over and over.

There is no "Undo" button in life. But there is wisdom to make the right decisions and move on.

True Transformers

2011-11-19T20:36:00.013-06:00

Romans 12:2 "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind."

When I was a child "Transformers" were a really big deal, and as with all things they have now come full circle to become an even bigger deal. My son now likes them more than I did as a child (I was quite the tomboy!)...yes, I had a transformer when I was a little girl! But what exactly is the allure of Transformers? You have a vehicle/machine of some sort that has the ability to transform into something incredible - a giant fighting robot that can talk and shoot lasers; a transformation that is possible because the machine is full of LIFE.

Have you ever seen a "transformer"? Not a living robot, but a person who has been transformed by God, completely changed by the Way, the Truth, and the LIFE. If you have, it's not something you have to wonder about or question, it's unmistakable. And it is beautiful.

Sometimes you can know someone for long enough that you basically know what to expect from them. You see how they act, hear how they speak, and in some cases you know for the most part how they feel or what motivates them. And then, you don't see them for a while, or maybe you only get the chance to talk to them every once in a while, but suddenly out of the blue there they are...and you see the change. You will not forget it when you see it; to see how incredibly God has worked in the life of another sort of brands itself on your heart. To see a person transformed from who they used to be into someone full of the power of God, full of His glory, full of faith in Him, and walking upright in His power and might is such an edifying experience.

We are all a work in progress, being transformed daily into the image of God...IF we allow Him to change us. There have been many times that I have regretted things I have said and done or beaten myself up over mistakes in my past, but the truth is that everything in my life up until this point has helped shape me into the person I am now. All of the best things in my life, the best things I have done, the things that were not a step above mediocrity, the failures in my life, and the very worst of me - all fit together to make up who I am.

I am a transformer, constantly being changed into who God has made me to be...through my relationship with Him, through my experiences in life, through lessons learned (most often the hard way). I hope that when people see me they see a life transformed, a woman chasing after God with ALL that I am, and a heart that will never be satisfied with anything less than all that He has for me. I hope that when people see me, they see a transformer.

2 Corinthians 3:18 "And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord's glory, are being transformed into His image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit."

The Road Before Me...

2011-09-06T15:10:00.006-05:00

The other day I was out running errands which required me to drive in a really pretty area on a beautiful day with lots of time to...think. As I passed such gorgeous scenery and my mind began to wander, I found myself driving through a dense fog of memories. You may ask why I was driving through a "fog" of memories instead of dancing lightly on moss colored paths of rose strewn memories, and I will tell you.

When you are driving down the road where there is thick fog, it decreases your visibility. You are unable to see in front of you or around you effectively. You have to go slowly and your way is darker because of the visual obstruction caused by the fog. Well, memories can be like fog. Memories can be good or bad, but they are just that...memories. They are not forward motion, but a glance behind. And when our memories consume us, rather than being able to move forward, we find our path obstructed.

What the Lord showed me as I drove home that day was how our lives are very like our car driving down the road. He showed me how He has us on a particular path, going to specific destinations in life, and it is our choice whether we will stay on the path appointed for us and do all that He has called us to do, or whether we will choose our own way and allow distractions to pull our attention down the wrong road.

I saw lots of interesting looking paths off to the side of the road: country trails, side roads, beautiful fields...but none of these places were going to get me to my destination. And if I went the wrong way, I would simply have to backtrack and take longer getting where I was going because I got off the right road. It's so very important that we hold God's hand tightly and walk with Him, beside Him, allowing Him to lead us in the right direction. Our ways are not His ways, so trusting the direction we think we should go without first waiting to see if He is leading us there will sometimes set us back a long way or land us in an entirely wrong place.

One thing that God showed me so clearly was how important it is to look ahead. The dense fog of memories were behind me, and I could look in the rear view mirror to see where I had been, but He showed me that if we continue to look in the rear view mirror at what is behind, then we are no longer able to see what is ahead. If our focus is not set on the road before us, then we will not be able to go very far on it. Staring in the rear view mirror while trying to drive forward will almost certainly lead to a wreck. We have a choice to make...to hang onto the past and remain caught up in the "woulda's, coulda's, and shoulda's," or in the has been's and all of the good old days, or bad old days in some cases; OR we can set our eyes on the road before us, listen for the voice of the the Sovereign Lord who only wants the very best for us (Jeremiah 29:11), and follow HIS path into our future. The best is yet to come. Believe it, and let go of what is gone.

Finding Refuge

2011-09-01T14:44:00.007-05:00

I love how God speaks to us in so many different ways. One tool that He has spoken to me much through is "The Hiding Place," the story of Corrie Ten Boom. She and her family hid and saved hundreds of Jews during the holocaust, and were punished severely when they were caught. I have been listening to a dramatization of the story on audio, and have found such wonderful wisdom to apply to my own life today.

One thing that has really stood out to me is the forgiveness displayed by Corrie's sister, Betsy, and how this affected Corrie...leading her to be able to forgive those who had done such great harm to her and her family. Betsy compared all situations to things that Jesus had gone through, and opened Corrie's eyes up to what true forgiveness and the undeserved grace and love of a holy God really meant for all people, not just for those deemed worthy to receive it. None of us are worthy in ourselves.

Another thing that I really grabbed onto in the story was a statement Corrie Ten Boom had made in regards to her sister's death. She said that "God was good...even when Betsy died." She knew that no matter what our circumstance, no matter what we face, no matter what we lose...God IS ALWAYS good. We don't always understand the reason why things happen as they do, and we don't always have the answers, but one thing never changes...God IS good.

The Ten Boom family offered a safe place for those who feared for their lives, those who had no hope, and seemingly no chance. God used them, as well as others, to make a difference when it seemed all was at an end.

And now, for all of us, no matter who we are or where we're from, God IS our safe place...He is our refuge in time of trouble. He gives us light and leads us when we can't see the path before us. He gives wisdom and peace. There have been many times that I have felt I had nowhere to turn or no one to talk to, no one who could help or understand. But my Lord and Savior is my hiding place, my refuge, my fortress. The enemy can stomp and storm, but my God loves me and holds me tightly in His hands. I have found the best refuge, a place where I am never alone, and it is in His arms.

It's Been a While...

2011-08-31T07:57:00.004-05:00

Wow, this is my first post in such a long time! I have truly missed being able to blog, but am so very thankful for the many other things that God has done in my life in the time I have been off. Some people may think that blogging, or writing in general, is a waste of time and they don't have time for it, but even this morning I have visited three of my favorite blogs and God has spoken to me through every one of them! We are so often tools in the lives of others when we allow God to weild us in His hands. We are His mouth speaking truth to the right person at the right time. Always remember that what you have to say is so very important, even if you feel that it is incredibly insignificant! God knows what He is doing and He knows exactly when to work, and who He wants to work through.

I will post again later, but just wanted to encourage you to be a vessel that God can pour His love and light through.

Be blessed today and follow the Lord with everything you have and everything you are.

Deep Thoughts...

2009-01-04T13:20:00.002-06:00

You know you have been texting too much, or perhaps just spending too much time on the computer, when the letters in the captchas start to seem like phrases and actual communication...LOL! Can anyone relate?

A Christmas Story...

2008-12-25T21:39:00.011-06:00

Well, MERRY CHRISTMAS everybody!!! I hope that all of you have had a wonderful, amazing, warm and cozy, extremely exciting, fantastic, memorable Christmas!

This Christmas has been a bit different for us. We stepped away from tradition a bit this year (not by choice), and had a very different Christmas day than usual.

We go to my grandmother's house every year for Christmas on my side of the family. This year she is having some major problems with some vertebrae in her back, and she just could not have it at her house, and didn't feel like going to any other get-togethers either. So, our family, my parents, and one aunt and one cousin got together today. We had to try to decide on a meeting place, and it is very hard to find anywhere that is open on Christmas day! We ended up finding out that the China Pan restaurant was open three towns over from us. It is REALLY good. But, my hubby and my cousin both hate Chinese food! LOL! Well, as we got there today, we noticed that IHOP was open, but everyone was already at China Pan - hubby groaned... I completely and totally felt like we were in that movie, "A Christmas Story", only without the servers coming and singing carols at our table!

We ended up really enjoying the meal, even my hubby found plenty that he liked - while only biting into two things that he was appalled by. He left well-sated, and I think with a better view of Chinese food. It ended up being a really fun time...

I have posted a few pics for ya'll...

This first one is of our family at the restaurant...

This one is the pic of the kids that we put on our Christmas cards... :0)

Aren't they BEAUTIMOUS???

Jordan loves The INCREDIBLE HULK!!!

Noelle with her sweet baby Jane - thanks so much Tina!!! Love you!

"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night..."

Blessed Beyond Measure...

2008-12-08T22:04:00.007-06:00

Hi there! I'm back! YAY!

Finally, I have been able to get reconnected online. Things have been, and are still, quite crazy around here; so I'm still not sure how much I will be able to post until January. This week is particularly crazy. This past Saturday we had practice for our church musical, then Sunday morning, praise team practice for both church services yesterday. We practiced again yesterday afternoon for the musical. Today, I had to do some crocheting, and this afternoon I had to practice again for a different event. Back in September I was booked as the entertainment for a Christmas dinner for several branches of one of our local banks. I am very excited about it, a bit nervous, and completely surprised at how fast it has gotten here. I mean, they called me in September, and now it's already time for the dinner! CRAZY! Time seems to be flying by in an awfully big hurry! So, we practiced for a couple of hours this afternoon for that, then the dinner is tomorrow night. On Saturday morning we will practice again for the church musical, then Sunday morning, AND THEN...THE MUSICAL Sunday night! YAY!

Some of you may know I started a new job too. I'm working nights at the same store as my husband as a night manager. I have a great schedule - Monday through Friday, so weekends off with my family - God is good, but you all don't need me to tell you that. I feel so blessed to have a job, as they seem to be hard to come by these days.

So, homeschool mom by day, businesswoman by night, crocheting creatively after work, and spending time with my hubby and children and singing as much as possible on the weekends.

God has met amazing needs for us, partly through blessing me with this job, and I find my faith building day by day. God is good, so much more so than we will ever comprehend. I'm overcome and overwhelmed by his goodness, by his grace, by his compassion, and mercy.

I have missed all of you my bloggy friends, and I hope to hear from you all soon.

Much love,
Aprille :0)

Away For a Little While...

2008-10-28T12:14:00.000-05:00

Hi there everybody. I'm sorry I haven't been on here for a while or been to visit your blogs either. We have had to cut out our internet service for a little while, along with a couple of other extra things that we could do without for a short time. I'm only able to get on the computer at our local library every once in a while, so I will be checking in when I can. Thank you so much for continuing to visit, and for those of you who are new to my blog, I apologize that I will not be able to post very often - at least for now. I hope to be back up and running again soon, but until then, thank you all for your friendship, for sharing your wisdom through posts on your blogs and comments on mine, and I hope to talk with you all again soon.

Please feel free to continue commenting anytime, I will be able to check in probably at least once a week.

Love to you all,
Aprille :0)

New Purses...

2008-10-17T17:51:00.003-05:00

Hi y'all! If you get a minute, I hope you'll run over to my other blog and check out my new projects. I have three new purses that I have posted that were special orders, and will have at least one more by Monday or Tuesday. Let me know what you think!

Love,
Aprille :0

A Time For Serious Prayer...

2008-10-14T10:38:00.004-05:00

I hope that ya'll will take a moment to go and visit Miriam's site, Redeemed by Love. She has posted about praying over the upcoming election, and how the outcome of that election will determine the direction our country heads in. This is definitely a time for serious prayer.

Click on the link below to read Miriam's post.

http://redeemedbyhislove.blogspot.com/2008/10/seeking-jesus-moretime-off-from.html

A Touch of Fall...

2008-10-02T22:02:00.012-05:00

Hi everybody! I have been off for a little while again, but wanted to drop in for a few minutes to say hello to all of you.

Some of you have been showing pictures on your blogs of the scenery around where you live, and so I wanted to share some of where we live here in Tennessee. Right now, there is hardly anywhere you can drive around here without passing by cotton fields. I have really been struck by what an amazing thing God has given us with the cotton plant. I mean, here is something that grows out of the ground, sprouts out like a beanstalk, and blooms like a flower - and we are able to make clothes and so much more out of it! What an amazing, fantastic miracle of God's creation. So, I just wanted to share some pics with you of this beautiful field full of cotton behind our house.

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This first picture was taken on September 25.

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The second picture was taken today, October 2, what a difference!

There is hardly any green left on the plants - just lots more cotton!

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I wish ya'll could see the trees better in the background.

They are just starting to turn beautiful fall colors now!

THIS IS JUST MY FAVORITE SEASON!!! :0)

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My kids think this is so cool!

Well, I hope that you have all enjoyed this little peek into our scenery around here. Hopefully, I will be able to post some more fall pics soon!

New Purse...

2008-09-19T04:33:00.005-05:00

Hi ya'll! If you have time, drop by and see my latest purse on my other blog. If you haven't had a chance to visit for a while, there are a few new projects. I'd love to hear what ya'll think!

Subscription Confusion...

2008-09-18T08:32:00.003-05:00

Hi everybody! I just wanted to let you know that for those of you who tried to subscribe to my Creations by Aprille blog, for some reason it subscribed you to this blog. So sorry! The problem is fixed now, and if you would like to subscribe to my craft blog, please go back now and subscribe again. This time you will be connected to the correct blog.

I apologize for the inconvenience!

Much love,
Aprille :0)

Check out Dianne's Giveaway!!!

2008-09-15T14:35:00.005-05:00

I would encourage all of you to go visit Dianne at Majestic Mountains, Rolling Hills, Gentle Streams and check out her fantastic giveaway! Dianne has a lot of wonderful posts on traveling, recipes, family, and just the wisdom of a Godly woman! Go visit her, and add her blog to your favorite list because you're gonna love it! Good luck to all of you in the giveaway!!! :0)

A Little Time Off...

2008-09-09T10:46:00.006-05:00

Hi everbody! I'm sorry I haven't been able to visit your blogs in a few days. I'm swamped with craft orders right now! YAY! I will be dropping in as often as I can to your blogs, but I will not be able to post for a few days most likely. Also, I will have new projects posted on my craft blog by the end of the week, so I hope you'll check in over there in the next few days to see what's new!

Also, an update on my last post. I weighed on Saturday, and found that I had not gained half of my weight back, but OVER half my weight! Aaaaggghhh!!! I had to keep quoting my post to myself, "I am more than the mirror tells me...", LOL - I know that probably sounds crazy to you! Anyway, I have lost four pounds, and am officially back to the halfway point again! And to top it off, I'm doing it in a HEALTHY way! :0) I'm eating good foods, I'm not skipping meals, I'm doing it the right way and it's working. I'm not going by any particular eating plan or diet or anything, just making good choices. Now, if I could just fit a workout in there somewhere....

Thanks to all of you again for all of your encouragement and prayers. You have touched my heart with your kind words and I cannot tell you how much what you have said to me has helped. For those of you who were no able to send comments, but emailed me or called me - thanks to you too. I'm truly blessed to have such a circle of friends!

Hope you're all having a great week!
Love,
Aprille :0)

The Truth Will Set You Free...

2008-09-03T22:31:00.011-05:00

This is a very personal post (and a long one!) about something that is close to my heart, and I realize that by putting it out here in the blogosphere it will now be the equivalent of my wounds laid open for all to see. But, we all know that the truth will set you free..........and I refuse to wear these shackles a minute longer.

Some of you have been following my blog ever since it started, back when it used to be called Aprille's Weight Loss Journal. It was a daily diary of my food intake, exercise regimen, and weight loss. I also posted about things going on in my life, pictures of my family and stories about them, what God was doing in my life, etc. However, I began to feel that since I was blogging under the guise of being a "weight loss journal", that probably I should just be talking about my weight loss journey. So, when I had not lost any more weight or when maybe I had gained a pound or two - whatever the case may have been - if there was no progress, then I felt like a failure and that what I had to say was not worth reading. I began posting less and less, and Michelle began hijacking my blog more and more trying to get me to post, etc.

Finally, I decided to change my focus. I didn't want my blog to be all about my weight because it was not doing my self-esteem any good. Also, I felt like my weight should be a very small part of who I am, not the main part of who I am. So I changed the name after much consideration to "Clay in the Hands of the Potter", to remind myself and everyone else that I am being molded and shaped daily - that we are all being molded and shaped daily - into what God wants us to be (if we let Him, that is).

Feeling better about this, I got back to posting regularly, and in the meantime, my weight has been creeping back up - I now have gained back half of what I had lost originally. Depression began to creep back in as events have unfolded in my life. I can honestly say that "Life happened" in 2008 - maybe that doesn't make sense to you, but it just seems like my life in so many aspects was turned upside down, inside out, and to me in so many ways it just seemed unrecognizable. I began to turn to food instead of God, and I have had some really low points...........of course if you're judging by Weight Watchers - I guess that would be "high" points! LOL!

Using food as a crutch was a new thing for me. I have had an eating disorder for many years, but the disorder apparently switched from one end of the spectrum to the other. My usual mode of thinking would be to do without food, so leaning on food is really a big change. I was diagnosed with anorexia in college, and rather than actually talking to me about it or at least tell me what his concerns were, the doctor sent a letter to my parents. I had no idea of the diagnosis until my parents informed me. My parents didn't mention it to me at first, but they were asking me about my eating all the time while I was 7 hours away, "are you eating good?", etc., etc., all the while I didn't really even realize that I had a problem. Then, one day I made the mistake of asking a friend if they thought I needed to lose weight, and they said that it wouldn't hurt. That was all the excuse I needed - I immediately fell into full-blown anorexia. When I came home finally for spring break, my parents thought I looked like I was on drugs. Pretty, huh? Anyway, I have battled this mindset for years, although never actually falling back into it completely. I'll lose a little weight, put it back on and then some, and cycle around again. Always though, keeping myself from actually going back down that dark road (well, most of the time anyway).

Lately though, as I felt things unraveling all around me, and I began to shovel food into me as if my stomach was a bottomless pit, I started turning back to my old friend, Ana. I would plan and plot ways to do it without my family noticing. Yes, I was actually planning it out, ways and means to an end...to the end.

Thankfully, God reeled me back into reality. And the reality is that I cannot go back to that lifestyle, any more than an addict can in good conscience go back to her drug. There is nothing about that thought process or lifestyle that leads to any good at all. You end up pushing away the people that love you because you become so obsessed with the control you feel you have, but that you really don't have at all.

Well, some of you are losing weight in healthy ways (Michelle, Terri, Dianne, Tina), doing healthy things, things that make you feel better, not just look better. So, I have decided to stop this cycle now, and begin fresh tomorrow morning. I will be a good steward of this body I have been given so that I can be the best wife I can be, so that I can be the best mom that I can be, so that I can minister effectively, and be the kind of Christian that people want to be around - not someone that they dread to see coming because of the chasm of dark misery that seems to follow behind.

And so, in wrapping things up, I just want to share a few truths with you...

The truth is that I am overweight.
But also, the truth is that I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
The truth is that I feel bad about myself.
But also, the truth is that I am a princess, a child of the King of Kings.
The truth is I have a real lack of self control.
But last and best of all, the truth is that HE IS....

HE IS my strength to turn away from the refrigerator and to my knees in prayer.
HE IS my resolve to not fall back into old, bad habits.
HE IS my confidence that I am more than the mirror tells me.
HE IS THE WORD that speaks life over me and hope, not eating disorders and death.
HE IS my victory, and through Him, I am an overcomer.

For some of you, this may be more information than you wanted to know, and if so I apologize. But I hope that this will speak to someone who maybe is fighting this same war within themselves. Don't give up, don't give in, and don't give the enemy another inch because we are overcomers by the blood of the Lamb.

Special thanks to Michelle, who has stood with me through all of these years of ups and downs. Thank you for being my forever friend, my sister in Christ, for being real with me, for loving me even though you know all about me, for helping me to stay level when you know the directions my thoughts sometimes lead me, for threatening bodily harm to me if you even see the slightest inkling of old habits slipping back in (LOL!), and for always telling me the truth, even when I don't want to hear it (but need to). I was truly blessed when I met you, and had no idea what an impact you would have on my life, and that all of these years later it would seem like we're family.

To Misty, who has been in my life for the past three years, and what a blessing you have been. Thank you for becoming a mentor to me, for guiding me and teaching me in ministry, and pushing me to become all that God would have me to be, to be the warrior that He has called me to be for Him. Thank you for seeing the potential in me that God has placed there, even when I have continued to doubt. Thanks to you and to David for allowing me to minister in your church, and for always believing in me. Thank you for your encouragement, for your wisdom, and also for telling it like it is - but always with kindness and a gentle spirit. You are a woman to look up to and I have been so blessed that God brought you into my life.

To Marla, You have been in my life for most of it, even though we didn't get to be good friends until the last few years. Thank you for your prayers that have meant so much. Thank you for always reaching in to my deepest reserves to try to pull out my fullest potential. You have so much to offer, and God is using you mightily to help stay-at-home moms get to stay at home! Thank you for always building me up, and for not allowing me to accept the lies that the enemy would try and spoon feed me about myself. Thank you for allowing God to use you without worrying about what anybody will say or think, but just walking in obedience.

Lastly, to all of you, my bloggy friends - thank you for all of your kind comments. Thank you for your encouragement. Thank you for your prayers.

Love,
Aprille :0)

Close to Nature...

2008-08-27T20:55:00.013-05:00

Many of you probably feed the hummingbirds during this time of year in this part of the country, but today I was able to get up close and personal with our hummingbirds with camera in hand.

One of the hummingbirds actually flew round and round me while I was filling up the feeder, I think he thought I was stealing his food! LOL!

This first little precious bird is very plainly colored, kind of taupe and off-white. This one seems really gentle, and actually ate while I was standing right there nearby - seemingly with little concern. You can see in the pic above that she is peeking around at me in between drinks just to keep an eye on what I might be up to...

Another drink, another peek out of the corner of her eye! LOL!

This second little bird is a bit more colorful, both in plumage and in personality. He doesn't like to share the food, and he was very concerned about my standing so close-by! I actually took some video with my camera and I wish I knew how to load it on here; if I figure it out I'll add it later. Anyway, I have footage of him zooming around the feeder, afraid to land because I was too close, and then he got brave and started dive-bombing me! I just knew I was going to get pecked in the head. The sound of a hummingbird zooming down and around your head is unique indeed! Anyway, he is not nice to the other little bird either. He runs her off , actually hit her once as he chased her while I was watching. Don't be deceived by his seemingly quiet and unassuming manner in the picture below! LOL!

This next picture is of him flying. It is a bit blurry, as he was moving REALLY fast! you can just see the blur of his wings. It amazes me how fast they can move!

And last, but certainly most obnoxious, is the nasty red wasp. I truly got a nature show while standing out by the little feeder. A red wasp would fly up while the birds were feeding at different times, and would chase the birds away. Then, another red wasp decided it was hungry, and tried to feed. Well, these critters apparently don't tolerate one another either - sharing is definitely not in the vocabulary. I cannot even describe it to you in a way that will really give you a true picture of what it looked like. One red wasp would fly at the other, and they don't mind hitting each other, then they would actually lock up like a couple of kids fighting - even a few times hitting the ground and rolling on the ground fighting. I cannot tell you how much it looked like people fighting - it was HILARIOUS! I was remaining very still during this whole event - as still as possible that is - with the occasional duck of the head. I finally stepped back a few feet because a couple of angry red wasps were not exactly something I wanted to come into contact with me accidentally! They would probably forget all about each other and start stinging me! Well, maybe not. It wasn't a risk I was willing to take anyway.

It was very upsetting to see the wasps chase off the birds, and very upsetting to see one bird chase away another bird, but that's how it is in nature I suppose. I'm just glad to have had my brief little glimpse today into the wild kingdom of rural America, and to have had a chance to get so close to some of God's creatures - although I have no desire to ever again see the red wasp any closer than I did today!

This One's For You Vols Fans!...

2008-08-21T15:56:00.008-05:00

Here is my fourth purse, it's a University of Tennessee Volunteers purse. I'm so excited about this one, I'm a big fan, although I can't even come close to being as big a fan as my hubby!

This is all done in single crochet with Simply Soft yarn. I did the handle a little differently than I have been doing on the other purses, just for a change! I did the "T" with needlepoint. The liner is done in a Tennessee Vols printed flannel fabric.

Update...

2008-08-21T09:11:00.003-05:00

I just wanted to update ya'll. I will be posting a new purse this evening. Sorry I haven't posted, I've just been really busy! So, I hope you'll come back and visit later on to see my newest project!

Happy Thursday everybody!

Take a Moment to Stop By...

2008-08-17T15:05:00.003-05:00

I just read a really good post over at Pinkshoelady, and I would like to refer all of you over that way if you have a moment. Pamela has some really good wisdom that she shares on her site, and I think this is such a good post. Here is the link...

http://pinkshoelady.blogspot.com/2008/08/counterfeit-castles-and-fake-pearls.html

My Third Project...

2008-08-16T03:39:00.013-05:00

Well, it is 3:41 a.m. and I have finally finished my third purse. I made really good progress and got the body of the purse done at the first of the week in one night. But, I was doing some different things with this one, so it took a bit longer than I had expected.

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I used a shell stitch for the body, which I had never done before. The handle was crocheted using two strands of yarn together, which I had also not done before in my purses.

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I decided to do a bit of decoration on the stitching, so that took a little while, but wasn't very hard. The flap for the purse needed to be angled (at least I wanted it to be!), so I had to learn how to do that, and my mom also showed me how to do the button loops in a different way than I had done before, which I liked much better, and stronger.

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I also got my first order for a purse yesterday. A lady asked me how much I was charging for the purses, and told me what color she would like, etc. Also, Misty suggested that I start a separate blog for my purses, so I will be putting that up shortly. I am deciding on a name and trying to get the details worked out before I put up the new site. This is SO exciting!!!

"It's a Slow Fade..."

2008-08-14T13:11:00.005-05:00

I just wanted to share this very powerful song with all of you. Many of you may have heard it already, but for those of you who have not, please see/listen to the video on YouTube. It is called "Slow Fade" by Casting Crowns. Even if you have heard the song, just take a minute if you can to read over the lyrics - very powerful! I have also added it to my playlist so you can hear it while you read! :0)

Here are the lyrics:

Slow Fade
By Casting Crowns

Be careful little eyes what you see
It's the second glance that ties your hands as darkness pulls the strings
Be careful little feet where you go
For it's the little feet behind you that are sure to follow

Chorus
It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
It's a slow fade, it's a slow fade

Be careful little ears what you hear
When flattery leads to compromise, the end is always near
Be careful little lips what you say
For empty words and promises lead broken hearts astray

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day

Bridge
The journey from your mind to your hands
Is shorter than you're thinking
Be careful if you think you stand
You just might be sinking

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
Daddies never crumble in a day
Families never crumble in a day

Oh be careful little eyes what see
Oh be careful little eyes what you see
For the Father up above is looking down in love
Oh be careful little eyes what you see

Our choices truly affect other people, whether we realize it or not. Secret sins don't stay that way. We have to live a life of no compromise every day, knowing that our children are watching and following our every step.

My Second Project...

2008-08-10T23:55:00.007-05:00

Here it is...

This is my second purse (if you missed the first one, please see my last craft post). I started it on Wednesday night, and got through with the purse and liner (used the Winnie the Pooh fabric again) by Thursday night. However, it has taken me the better part of the past three days to complete the rest - the two handles, fastener, button, and the two flowers on the bottom left-hand corner. This purse is just a little over twice the size of the last purse I did, and my mom has taught me some new stitches since I made the first one. My last purse was all done in single crochet, while this one was done with single and double crochet. I might be able to go faster with a pattern, but I'm just not quite ready for that yet! My mom sat down and showed me how to do the flowers, and I have made three so far - I really like them! This is a close-up of a the flowers and button (below).

Thank you, ladies, for your encouraging words about my last purse. Your craftiness has been a big factor in my yearning to learn to crochet. You are all inspiration to me and precious to my heart. And this does not just go for those of you who crochet or knit or sew, but to all of you who take care of your families with such zeal and love, and share bits of your wisdom online for the benefit of all. I love you all. Great BIG ((HUGS)) to all of you! You have blessed and enriched my life through your friendship across the miles.

Thank you, mom, for showing me through my whole life how to be a christian, a wife, a mom, and for setting an example of producing things like this with your own hands. You have helped to shape my personality and every aspect of my life. You are amazing, you are a rock - just a mountain of strength. I love you!

How Many Times Have We Circled This Mountain?

2008-08-05T12:19:00.008-05:00

Do any of you struggle? Do you struggle with temptation? Do you struggle with old, bad habits? Do you struggle with negative thinking? Do you struggle against yourself constantly?

Well, I ought to have some pretty built up muscles, because it seems as if I struggle against myself quite a lot.

I was just sitting there today thinking about the fact that once we have victory over something, once we have resisted temptation, once we have broken an old habit, once we have kicked out all of that old negativity...why do we allow it to slip back in? Why do we have our old sinful nature, our bad attitude, our untamed tongues, pinned down in a tight hold - defeated, only to allow them to creep back up and get us in a choke-hold again?

Are we gluttons for punishment? Do we enjoy the constant struggle?

I don't. I really don't, and yet, as I said before - I continue to struggle.

Well, once again, I picked up my handy Joyce Meyer devotional calendar, where God had a word just for me today, and I hope that it will speak to your hearts too...

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"Tuesday, August 5...

The people of the nation of Israel wandered around in the wilderness for forty years, a journey that should only have taken eleven days. Why? We really shouldn't look at the Israelites with such astonishment, because most of us do the same thing as they did. We keep going around and around the same mountains instead of making progress. The result is, it takes us years to experience victory over something that could have and should have been dealt with quickly.

Deuteronomy 1:2 It is [only] eleven days' journey from Horeb by the way of Mount Seir to Kadesh-barnea [on Canaan's border; yet Israel took forty years to get beyond it]."

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There have been so many times that I have looked at the story of the Israelites and wondered "How, after all of the amazing miracles that they had seen, could they ever doubt that God would deliver on his promises?"

And yet, today, I find myself again in the position of one of the Israelites. I find myself once again circling the same mountain one more time.

God has made us overcomers. He has given us victory over every single weapon Satan would use against us, and He has given us victory over our old sinful nature. We are a new creation and old things are passed away, so let's stop looking up at the mountain and walking in circles, and focus our eyes on what is ahead, moving forward through His strength, into His promised land.

I'm tired of circling the mountain - I'm moving on...
Thank you, Jesus.

My First REAL Project...

2008-08-02T12:43:00.008-05:00

I am SOOOOOO excited!!!! I have not posted this week because I wanted to wait until I had my first project to post.

My mom had told me at the first of the week that I should try a different yarn, just to try something new and see what the different types of yarn are like. I also used a different hook. My mom had brought me a bag of some leftover yarn of hers, most of it was baby yarn. There was some HomeSpun yarn though, that was leftover from a project she had done for my son, so I tried it first. I thought this would give me a chance to use a bigger hook too (K). I found that I really did not care for that type of yarn much at first, it's not smooth, and I thought I would have a hard time with it. I actually ended up liking it pretty good.

I was just practicing with it, but I kept going until I had a pretty good sized square. I took a few minutes trying to figure out what I could do with it. I didn't just want to sit around crocheting for no reason...I wanted to MAKE something!!! So, it came to me as I looked at it; I would make a purse! Nothing fancy of course, but I knew exactly what I needed to do. I didn't have a pattern or anything, I just went by what I had in my head.

Well, I just finished it a little while ago, and here it is...

I had some material in my craft stuff that would go just perfect, I thought, with the yarn. It was an off-white fabric with Winnie the Pooh characters on it, very cute.

I found some really cute big buttons at Wal-Mart and made just a really basic loop fastener to go around the button. In retrospect, I think maybe I should have used a different color yarn for the loop, but I'll have to save that for another purse - I'm not changing this one now! The loop works fine and is easy to see in person, but I think it would have made it a little prettier to put a different color fastener on.

So, please let me know what you think! I certainly know it is far from perfect, but it is my first project and I'm so, so happy to have completed it. I have such a sense of accomplishment just from completing this purse! I already have more ideas for what I will be doing next.

Also, this purse is fairly small because the width was already set before I decided to even make a project. I definitely plan on making my next purse BIGGER!

I Got An Award!

2008-07-31T09:39:00.015-05:00

I got this award from Michelle. She is my dear forever friend, and she has an amazing blog. If you have never checked her blog out you have GOT to!!! She has some really good insight and wisdom as a Christian, as a wife, as a mom, as a teacher (homeschool), and just general multi-tasker. Love you Michelle, thank you for nominating me!

Now to the award instructions:

1. The winner can put the logo on his/ her blog.
2. Link to the person you received your award from.
3. Nominate at least 7 other blogs.
4. Put links to those blogs on yours.
5. Leave a message on the blogs of the people you have nominated.

I am nominating:

1. Tracey at Babaloo.

2. Michelle at Walking My Way to Health.

3. Shauna at ...That They May Be One...

4. Lynn at All Things Bright and Beautiful.

5. Tracy at Beyond My Picket Fence.

6. Pamela at Pinkshoelady.

7. Jennifer at Blessed and Scrappin'.

Another fun quiz...

2008-07-28T09:18:00.003-05:00

Cool Traci, me too!

find your inner PIE @ quizmeme.com

Trying New Things...

2008-07-23T22:42:00.011-05:00

I feel like I have had a really productive day today!

My interview went okay (I'm not a good judge of how these things go), I am supposed to find out something by Friday. Please continue to pray. I'm definitely still praying! There were some very interesting developments which I will share later with you all. Suffice it to say that GOD IS GOOD!!! Amen? Amen!

My mom brought my kids home today. They went unexpectedly to spend the night with she and my dad last night. My parents had just come by to visit yesterday and my daughter started begging to spend the night, so I relented. Anyway, my mom was going to start teaching me to crochet when she came back with the kids today. EXCITING!!! That was new venture #1. It went okay, but about three or four stitches in, I thought it would be too hard, and considered giving up. However, my mom really encouraged me to keep going. So, here is my progress as of this evening. You all may laugh, you may think this is pitiful, but I was really pleased with my progress. I CAN FINALLY CROCHET!!! Albeit, in an amateur sort of way...

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We went to the library and I picked up lots of Spanish stuff for kids, as I'm starting to teach my kids Spanish this year. They kept asking, "how do you say that stuff?", so I decided there would be no better time to start teaching them than when school starts and while they are so young! Right? I think so too.

Lastly, I see on some of your blogs all of these little tags and pics regarding Jane Austen books, and well, please do not throw rocks at me or gasp in horror as I tell you the following truth about me... I HAVE NEVER READ A JANE AUSTEN BOOK...there I said it. I'm so glad I finally got that off of my chest! LOL! I don't have a lot of time to read, so I check out audio books as much as possible. I picked up Sense and Sensibility, Pride and Prejudice, and Emma. So, please wish me well as I branch out into a new avenue of literature, not to mention a new section of the library.

After my new experiences, I came home and made a beef stew (yummy!) for supper with some buttery rolls (heavenly, Michelle!), and sat down to work on my new project - a crocheted something or 'nother...

Goodnight all.

Where's My Soap Box?...

2008-07-20T14:04:00.010-05:00

I'm about to delve into more medical reports, but wanted to take a moment to post something that I feel is very important...

...give me just a second, I have to pull my soap box out to stand on...

James 3:2 "We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check." NIV

I am not going to tell you where I was, or when I heard this, or who even said it. I am just going to give you the circumstance of what was said, and how it made me feel.

I was sitting down, and two people were behind me talking... The first person said "oh, there goes so-and-so"...The second person said "my, he/she has really put on weight, he/she used to be so slim"...

OUCH!

No, they weren't talking about me, but it hit me just as hard. Since I got married I have gained quite a bit of weight. So, when I go somewhere, especially a place where people have known me for years or even for most of my life, I'm a bit self-conscious. I'll admit it. I am concerned that they think "boy, has she put on the weight".

Am I alone? Do we all have these insecurities?

I dare say we do.

Then why, why, WHY???, do we say things that point out others' insecurities, others' weaknesses? Why?

What if this conversation took place in church? What if these two people were talking about someone that was my relative, and I overhead them? What if I came into church feeling a bit insecure, visiting for the first time, and I heard this conversation taking place behind me? How would I feel? Is that a church I would want to continue to attend?

People hear us that we don't always realize are listening. These two people obviously did not think they were talking loud enough for others to hear, but they were.

This really applies to every place we frequent, even in our homes - because our children are picking up on everything we say and do. If I talk about somebody, they hear it, they learn it, they MAY even repeat it... I saw a good sign outside a church this week that said (this is as close as I remember it), "if you only say nice things about people, you never need whisper."

The book of James has so much great teaching on taming the tongue, and I need to learn it as much as anybody. What happened in this story I told above really was an eye-opener for me, and I hope that I will learn not to make this same mistake...

I Took the Quiz!

2008-07-19T17:00:00.001-05:00

What type of Mother Hen Are You?
by Montessorimom.com: Educational Resource

Just an update...

2008-07-18T20:46:00.003-05:00

Hi everybody. I know I said I was going to be off of here for a few days, but I just wanted to extend the prayer request...

The company I am hoping to get hired on with contacted me this morning to set up a time for an interview. We got it set up for this coming Wednesday, July 23, in the a.m. Please continue to pray; I truly, truly appreciate your prayers.

Thank you all for your encouragement! God is GOOD!!!

Waiting for an Answer...

2008-07-17T20:44:00.008-05:00

I will be taking a little time off for the next few days or so and I covet your prayers during this time. Some of you know that I am a medical transcriptionist, and have been for the past seven years. I have been able to work from home, keep my kids at home, and we have just completed our first year of homeschool. The clinic I have been working for is a large one here in our area, having multiple branches. They have been slowly phasing us out as they move toward computer voice recognition, and as of the first week or so of May, I ran out of work.

Sooooo, I have been unemployed for two and a half months now, and it has hit us hard. We certainly do not live an extravagant lifestyle in any way, shape, or form, and things were tight as it was. Now, it's getting just plain unliveable.

I have been putting out resumes and applications online over the past week, and have interviewed once so far. I am praying that the right job will open up by God's hand, and that all other doors will be closed. And so, I wait...

A couple of weeks ago my employer of seven years sent me an email asking if I could take one day of work a month, as the doctor I had been working for had requested that we continue to do one particular day a month when he was not working in the clinic, but was making rounds. I was happy to take that one day, but again, it would not be sufficient. However, this helps me in that I can still say I am employed.

Then, this morning I got another email from her asking if I could take some dictation that another employee normally does. It is for a different clinic, and she needed it done ASAP! I said I could take it (happily!!!). I went to pick it up and it was several days' worth of work, and so I have plenty of work to keep me busy over the next few days here. Hopefully, during that time I will hear from one of the other jobs that can offer me full-time work.

So I am asking you please, if you think about it, pray for me as I am awaiting news on a job opening. I was so encouraged by Terri's post the other day (click on her name to read the post) and how God so plainly gave them the answer they needed and the provision they needed.

I will be back online when I can. I appreciate your prayers! :0)

Time to be Silly...

2008-07-16T11:55:00.009-05:00

I just would like to say for those of you who have young children that taking time to read a Dr. Seuss book is always worth while. My mom had a Dr. Seuss collection for me when I was a kid and she used to read them to me, and I had such a love of books! I learned to read early and began reading everything for myself, Dr. Seuss and everything else I could get my hands on. I still have that collection of Dr. Seuss books - How the Grinch Stole Christmas, Horton Hears a Who, Horton Hatches the Egg, And to Think That I Saw It All on Mulberry Street, If I Ran the Circus, etc., etc.

My daughter wants me to read these to her all the time, and even my son likes them. I try to make them fun for her too. I do different voices for the characters and I just really get into the story with her. It's fun for her and it's fun for me. I can be tired and not really feel like getting into a book or reading out loud, but once I get started it's way fun!

To me, Dr. Seuss books get better with age. The way he wrote and rhymed, and all of the creativity; I love these books just as much now as I did as a kid.

I have to say that I don't have any of the primary books like Green Eggs and Ham, Hop on Pop, or One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish; only the larger books.

So, if you get a chance go check one of these out at the library and read one to your child. I think you'll both really get a kick out of it! And if you don't have small children, bring out the kid in yourself and take a break with a Dr. Seuss book. Read it out loud so you can really appreciate the rhyme and rhythm. It'll give you a little taste of childhool again.

Being Molded Daily...

2008-07-14T21:53:00.004-05:00

I just want to share something today that I read off of my Battlefield of the Mind calendar that sits on my desk. I have a calendar in the kitchen that I write things on, and it shows the entire month, so I use it most of the time. Therefore, my Joyce Meyer calendar sits on my desk and end up having to read to catch up because I don't use it as much.

What is always so amazing to me is that when I go to catch up, or even when I sit down and read the right devotion for a particular day, it is always so timely. That can't just happen to me, does it happen for you too? Doesn't it seem like God has something special for us to read, whether it is on someone's blog or on a calendar, maybe on TV or in a book, and most especially - in his Word?

Well, I just wanted to share one day of what I read tonight. It is actually tomorrow's devotion, but I wanted to read it anyway. God was really speaking to me through this and I wanted to soak up all I could...

"Tuesday - July 15

You are changing for the better. Every day you're growing spiritually. God has a plan for your life. These are the truths you must think on. This is what you are supposed to be doing with your mind! Think deliberately according to the Word of God; don't just think whatever falls into your head. Rebuke the devil and start going forward by thinking right thoughts."

"He Who began a good work in you will continue until the day of Jesus Christ (right up to the time of His return), developing (that good work) and perfecting and bringing it to full completion in you. Philippians 1:6"

Man, that is good stuff. We are constantly being molded into His image. He will continue the good work he began in us until it is brought to completion - to perfection.

As you think about your day, maybe you made mistakes (I sure do!), and maybe you did some things you're proud of and some things you're not. Maybe you were snide with your spouse and had a bad attitude, knowing it wasn't right, but chose to ignore it. Maybe you acted ugly to someone who cut you off in traffic. Maybe you were short with someone on the phone who was only doing their job. Maybe you were hasty with your children and punished unjustly or spoke unkindly. I've done these things, I'm not perfect. But I'm working towards perfection.

Instead of beating ourselves up over our faults and wallowing in our own unworthiness, let's remember the sacrifice Jesus became on the cross so that we could be worthy through Him. Let's not abuse his grace, but let's treat it with the value it deserves. It is by grace that we are saved, and nothing else. Our works CANNOT save us. What we are to do is read God's Word, seek His face, hold tightly to His hand, and do our best to become more like Him each and every day. He will take care of the rest. He will mold us into a beautiful vessel. He already knows what our finished product will look like. We see flaws and scars, but God sees a beautiful and unique creation.

Even the Little Things...

2008-07-09T22:47:00.020-05:00

You know God really cares about the little things. He cares about every aspect of our life, no matter how big or how small it may seem. Our needs matter to Him and our desires matter too.

Two weeks ago I was very concerned about how I was going to be able to get our homeschool curriculum in time for school to start. It just didn't seem doable. This was a "big" matter to us - school is really important, obviously. But, as usual, God was working things that I couldn't see yet, and He already had a blessing on the way. Thankfully, we will be able to get the curriculum on time, and will be able to get started when we need to! That is a big PRAISE THE LORD as far as I'm concerned! God is so AWESOME!

So the school stuff was a need that I was concerned about, and God took care of it!

For the past two or three years the kids have used the same pool at our house, and they have a blast in it. It's just a small pool with collapsible sides - but still great for their age. They love it. At the end of last season, when we took it down the last time, my husband noticed it had a hole in it. So, that was the end of that. We do have another pool that is BIG and inflatable, but we need a pump in order to inflate it, which we will have to purchase when the time comes. It is a great pool with two slides, way fun - but definitely need a pump! So, the bottom line is that we had not been able to replace the pool that tore up last summer, and also had not been able to get a pump for the new pool. My kids had gone to my parents' house to spend some of their summer vacation there, and their cousin lives next door. He is the same age as my son and they have a pool, so after they came home all I heard about was "when are we gonna get a new pool???" I honestly didn't know when it was gonna happen for them, and there was no way that it could be at the top of my priority list...Pay electric bill...buy swimming pool...hopefully toilet tissue... HA! No way. The pool was way further down the list.

Okay, so long story short...the day after I got the answer about the curriculum I got a call from a local business. The last time I had gone in I had registered for a giveaway they had going. I had registered before for a grill/charcoal/etc., and didn't win. But that day I was on my way out the door and happened to see in the window a swimming pool just like the one we had (the one with the hole in it), a cooler, and some beach towels. I ran back in and registered, and low and behold WE WON IT! The kids were so excited - you just can't even believe it.

So the pool was a want, a desire of my heart for my kids, and of course their desire probably even more so!

No, we don't have to have that little pool. Yes, we can get by without it! But my Daddy in heaven cares about every aspect of my life, the big and the small. A blessing is a blessing, and I felt such a boost in my faith from that. It just reminds me that my God loves me and my family and this whole world SO much. He cares enough about us that He will meet our every need if we just trust Him. He offered up His own Son to meet my ultimate need, the need for salvation.

I don't believe that we get everything that we want, especially when our wants are sometimes selfish. Phillipians 4:19 says that "my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus."(NIV) So we know from that verse that our needs will be met. But as far as wants, James 4:2 says "...You do not have because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures."(NIV) So, I believe that we get some of our wants, but it definitely depends on our motives.

The kids having a pool was honestly not something I remember praying for. It was something that I really wanted them to have though because it is really, really hot where we live! Now, if I pray for a brand new car that might be a bit more selfish for me! Not because it is wrong to pray for a new car, but because I have a car that is in working order, it runs good, it gets fantastic mileage; if I asked for more it would be a selfish request at this point because my need is met. Not to mention it would tack on a bill that we could not pay!

I say all of this because I'm feeling so blessed right now, but I have been struggling in the faith area for a little while now because I just couldn't see how certain things were going to fall in place, how certain needs were going to be met, etc. But I have to say that every time I look at that little pool in the backyard I remember that God cares about everything that I'm going through, everything that I'm facing, every answer I'm searching for, every need, every want, and even the little things.

Taking Time for You...

2008-07-06T22:17:00.012-05:00

It has been a busy weekend here and I feel like I'm heading into Monday just a wee bit behind. Not good, right? Well, in honor of feeling behind I have decided to take a little while to relax. I am having a cup of hot chamomille tea as I work on chapter three of my book. That is so relaxing to me! It really does so much good to take a little time for yourself to relax. Yes, it is late, it's 10:25 p.m., and I really should be in bed, but this is time I need to take for myself. Once I get on a roll writing it is hard for me to stop until I am completely done with the chapter, so I will probably be up for a while yet. But, this is excellent quality time for me.

Below is a picture of my favorite tea cup. My mom has a really fantastic collection of tea cups, including antique ones and lots of really pretty decorate china cups. I am not a collector of tea cups, just someone who enjoys tea. This particular cup was given to me as a gift. It's glass, not china, but because it was a gift drinking out of it makes it that much more enjoyable.

I took the time to stop and post about this because I think it is important for all of us to take some time for ourselves. We want to be at our best at all times, and we are more likely to be that if we are taking the time with the Lord that we should be taking, and also taking some time to take care of ourselves. I'm not just talking about taking care of ourselves as in putting make-up on or exercising or dressing up...no, I'm talking about taking care of ourselves mentally - getting the rest we need and time to unwind, a little time alone.

For me I like to drink hot tea and write, especially while listening to a bit of classical music. But for you, maybe it's a rich cup of coffee, or maybe curling up with a good book, possibly even a decadent chocolate chip cookie that is still a bit warm and gooey. For each of us our needs are different. So go, soak in a hot bubble bath, drink a cup of hot tea from your best china cup, or take five minutes just to go stand outside and watch nature, even go so far as to take a nap.

We should always remember that taking care of the people we love means also taking care of ourselves.

You asked for it!!!

2008-07-03T18:24:00.012-05:00

Okay, this is my second post for today, so if you're just reading this one scroll down and check out the other one first (Pulling His Weight...). Tina asked me to post some pics of my mom's projects. I am not crafty in this department, but my mom cross-stitches, crochets (does NOT knit!), sews in every way that you can I guess otherwise though. She used to make my clothes when I was a child, and all of the other kids were so jealous! She has made some clothes for my kids, but pretty much just pajamas. She lives too far off to get to do very many fittings. Those are packed up until winter, so no pics. I have lots of things she has made, but have only taken pics of a few to share with you all. Hope you enjoy these! Wish I could take credit for them, but my mom is sooooo talented in this department - not me!

These are the curtains she made for Noelle's room, Disney Princess curtains, she made them with the valance attached and the panels split so that they can be pulled back when we wish to do so. The curtain rods were from Wal-Mart, there is a pretty pink ball on each end with pink feathers around each one, and I think it sets the curtains off perfectly. And right beneath these are the curtains for Jordan's room, they match his sports themed room and are made exactly the same as Noelle's. We have not put up his decorative rod though - it's really cute with footballs on each end.

These are Jordan and Noelle's baby blankets (folded). Jordan's is the blue/white sparkly baby yarn with white trim, and by the time Noelle was born my mom had found a new yarn - not sure what it's called, but it's got a kind of soft terry sort of feel to it; pink and white of course.

This is actually a toy passed down from me to my daughter. My mom made this sheep for me when I was little and it is just precious. I wish you could see his little blue button eyes - really sweet. He is up on a high shelf in the playroom where I keep a few stuffed toys and dolls until my little girl wants to play with them, so I took the best pic I could with my arms outstretched!

And this is the last one. My mom made this for Noelle and I think it is just gorgeous, it's my absolute favorite afghan she has made - ever! She is making one like it for Jordan too, with just two different shades of blue and a maroon, I believe, which will match his room really well. Noelle's doesn't match her room, but it's just so BEAUTIFUL anyway!

Isn't my mom crafty??? Love you mom!

Pulling His Weight...

2008-07-03T10:42:00.008-05:00

Okay, so once again I am a couple of days behind....

On Tuesday, Michelle and her family had dentist appointments, so I kept her littlest boy -Nate - for a few hours. When they got home I had my kids and Nate outside playing, so Jacob and Amber came out to play with them for a few minutes before we had to leave. It turned into longer than a few minutes, it always does! But that was mainly because Michelle had to help me with some computer issues before I left! Anyway, while the kids were playing somebody spotted a strange event. We saw a red ant pulling a bee across the driveway. The bee was obviously dead, but it was just so amazing to see this tiny ant pulling this huge bee!

He was working so diligently and not giving up....

Hmmmm, could there be a lesson in this somewhere??? :0)

Certainly one I need to learn from!

Peace...

2008-06-29T16:22:00.007-05:00

Dear Lord, I need peace. I need Your peace - the peace that passeth understanding. I don't know what to do, I don't have the answers - but You do. You know exactly what needs to happen, and what will happen, long before it ever happens. You've known exactly what needed to happen in my life since before I was even born. I bring you my needs, my wants, my hopes and dreams, the desires of my heart, and I lay them at Your feet. I long for You to wrap Your arms around me and love me, and just to let me know that everything is going to be okay. Hold me, Lord, surround me with your love, your grace, your peace. I need You, and only You. I long to please You. Thank You Lord for loving me, the most unloveable, and for making me your daughter - a princess. I love You Jesus, and I pray in Your most precious and holy name, Amen.

I was so blessed at church this morning. We are still in transition, visiting, and I don't know for sure yet where God would have us now. My husband is still reeling from the loss of our home church, and he is having a hard time even thinking about getting rooted in anywhere yet. We need guidance, we need healing. We don't want to miss God. I put the picture at the top in here because when I stand under this tree in our yard and look up at the sky I think it is such a peaceful place. God has given me this beautiful view in my own yard, a place where I can truly appreciate the beauty He has created, and as I pray for peace I thought this picture was appropriate. I need the Lord to calm my mind, drive out fear, overcome doubt. I just need to be so full of Jesus that there is no room for any of that other stuff, any of that negativity. I need to know that God will bring me the right job so that our family will be provided for, so that food will be on our table, so that our needs will be met.

Oh God, I receive the answers you have for me because I know that You hold those answers already. You're not brainstorming somewhere about what is going to happen in my life. You already know. I receive, I receive what You have for our family, and for me.

A Party at the Library...

2008-06-27T21:22:00.013-05:00

Ms. Dot, with Jordan and Noelle

I have gotten behind again on my posting, so this will be a little bit of catch-up. This past Tuesday, the lady who has been the head librarian at our local library for 20+ years had her retirement party. It was a pretty big deal, lots of people, lots of food, and probably the loudest the library has been for quite a while! Ms. Dot has been the head librarian ever since I can remember and it's sad for me that she is retiring now. She has always been so precious to my kids, just like she always was to me. My kids absolutely love to go to the library and spend time. We have a great summer reading program there, and they just like to go in the kids' room and pick books, do puzzles, play with dinosaurs, etc. It's just a great place for them. These next pictures were of the kids and me standing in front of the mural in the kids' room at the library. I think the animals on the wall are so precious!

We'll miss you, Ms. Dot!

Letting the panda bear hug on us, and apparently the zebra is grazing on my hair...

This is a better shot of the entire mural in the library's kids' room.

Father's Day Weekend

2008-06-16T12:04:00.032-05:00

We had a good Father's Day weekend. Mitch's kids, Leslie and Alan, came over on Friday night to see him and brought him a present. We had a really good visit and I know he was so glad they got to come.

Then Saturday, Dad got some time to himself while I took Jordan and Noelle to the movies - FUN! We hardly ever, ever, ever get to go see a movie, and the kids were so pumped about it!

On Sunday, the kids gave Dad cards they had made for him and a present, then we headed off to church, where they made two more cards for him complete with candy attached! YUM! After church we went to see Mitch's Dad and had a nice visit with him. When we got there Mitch's sister and her family were in from out of town so we got to visit with them for a little bit too, so that was fun too. After we left his house, we went to meet my parents for a late lunch at Los Portales (more YUM!). I took my husband to Dairy Queen for a blizzard for a treat, my kids were riding with my parents and we were going to meet up with them at our house. Instead, my hubby wanted to go to Cypress Park which has a really great walking trail and thought that would be a good idea after our lunch. On the way to the park he gave me a little less than half of his Blizzard. He knew I was trying to be good and not eat anything like that, but he wanted me to have it, and well - let's just say he didn't have to twist my arm out of socket to get me to eat it! We all met up at the park and walked and looked at the animals, took a few pics, and went home. It was almost 5:00 when we got here and we were worn out! We sat around for the rest of the evening watching nature shows until bedtime, after Mitch had seen the baseball highlights that is! It was a really good weekend, hope ya'll enjoy the pics!

Mitch, Noelle & Jordan

My honey and me
Love you Sweetie!

Papaw, Noelle and Jordan

Me and my dad
Love you Dad!

Ahoy Me Mateys, Another Birthday Be A-Comin'...

2008-06-06T20:37:00.006-05:00

Well, another birthday is almost here. My little Jordan is turning eight years old on Monday! We went on and had his birthday party today at the park and it was just beautiful. It was not really a "party" per se, just really a nice get-together with two of Jordan's friends and their siblings, and his cousin. His grandma came and she brought his cousin, which was really nice! He was so excited he could hardly sleep. I'm talking about in the wee hours of the morning when it is still dark outside he was tossing and turning and could not sleep. His stomach was turning flip-flops just in anticipation of everyone singing the birthday song to him! It was such a fun time and a really perfect day! Thank you Lord for the beautiful weather today!

As the kids are getting older we have decided to stop having the "parties". We have always had the whole family there and lots of friends, but we feel like they're getting big enough now just to do something fun with their close friends (instead of mom and dad's friends) and that be enough. This is the first year we have done our parties like this and it's gone really well. Having the big parties are also not very reasonable for us anymore because of the considerable cost of having them! Anyway, it was a fun time, and he still has his real birthday on Monday to look forward to, the day he turns EIGHT, the day he becomes... well, he just becomes a year older! LOL!

I love my son and I"m so thankful for him and that we have been blessed with him. Hope ya'll enjoy these pics!

Birthday Boy Jordan!

Pirates Cake

Jordan, Brent, Christian, and Jacob

Great memories!

Changes...

2008-06-01T18:41:00.004-05:00

I have decided to change the name of my blog from my weight loss journal to the title you see above, "Clay in the Hands of the Potter". In the past few months, it seems there have been so many changes in my life that it is hardly recognizable as the same life! Of course, this is ridiculous, it is very much the same life, but there are some very big differences. I truly feel like clay in the hands of THE Potter, continually being molded and shaped, changed and improved (I hope), and I must remain pliable in His hands so that I can become exactly what He wants me to be.

I have been thinking for days and days, not sure how long, of what the name of this should be. I felt like with the old name there was just too much focus on my weight. I will still talk about what I am doing and my progress, and will include pics, but many times I just want to talk or share pictures, and I feel like it's not right because I'm supposed to be talking about my weight. My weight is only one part of me, and I don't want it to be the most important part. The most important parts of my life are Jesus, my family, my ministry, and my friends. My body, my self-image, my weight, are way, way down the list, or at least they should be! I have had times since I have had this blog that my body has been my main focus, and I would think constantly about what I would eat next, what exercise was next, etc. Then, if I didn't have an update or if I hadn't eaten right or had not exercised, I felt like a failure. This is not the way I need to be! I want to be healthy because my body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, I want to be healthy for me and for my family, and I want to live as long as possible to fulfil what purpose God has for my life.

So please, keep reading, keep commenting (I love to get your comments!). I will keep you all updated, but I just need you to know that my weight is not - and cannot be - my focus. Thanks so much to you all for your encouragement!

Natural Beauty...

2008-05-24T18:01:00.010-05:00

I have posted a picture of my beautiful little ballerina girl all made-up, and now here is my beautiful little girl in all of her natural beauty! The first pic is of Noelle wearing a staple of my wardrobe - my ballcap. LOL!She doesn't need a spot of make-up does she?

I Hope You Dance...

2008-05-15T20:20:00.003-05:00

My daughter's dance recital is this Saturday, and today we had the dress rehearsal. I think she is just absolutely beautiful, my little ballerina. Every time she dances it makes me cry, it is soooo precious! How did she get so beautiful, you might ask? God made her that way! How did I get blessed with such a wonderful daughter as this? God blessed me mightily!

Counting My Gains But Losses...

2008-05-12T09:28:00.006-05:00

Hello everybody! I'm still here! I apologize for the month off! I have missed blogging, but have just felt too overwhelmed to even bother with it. So, today I just had to sit down and do it. I had to make the decision to sit down and type. As my friend, Michelle, would say...I had to do it on purpose.

I feel as though my life has been in upheaval for a few weeks now, and as I sit here typing, wondering how much is okay to share, how much is okay to say, and what is too personal, I wonder "God, what comes next? What is the next step?". The hardest thing about change is the not knowing. Maybe it is easier to follow when we are blindfolded. Maybe it causes us to hold tighter to Christ when our eyes are covered so that we are unable to see the next step, causes us to not want to let go of His hand because as long as we hold on we know He will never, EVER lead us astray. Perhaps if my eyes were opened to see everything that would happen, I wouldn't have to trust Him as much and might depend too much on me.

For instance, yesterday my glasses finally broke. I have had them for a few years. I have contacts, but my allergies have been at their worst ever for the past three weeks. Now, I am forced to wear my contacts with the nice, gritty, sandpaper, itchy feeling in my eyes caused by allergies. Nice. Really nice. No, not really. I am frustrated and aggravated. I cannot afford new glasses right now. None of the eye doctors I know do payment plans. I have been told that one eye doctor does in special cases, but I would feel weird about that since he does not like to do it. I have no vision insurance currently. I miss my glasses.

I don't know what will happen next for my eyes. I don't know when I will be able to get glasses. But they are a need, a NEED, and my heavenly father will meet all of my needs according to His riches in glory through Christ Jesus. So, I wait, and now I have to trust, because I don't know what to do. I just don't know.

The glasses story is of course the least of my concerns at this time.

Another major concern is that I am now unemployed. I have been able to work from my home doing medical transcription since 2001. It has been important that I worked because we needed that income really badly. Now, it is gone. And, I am a homeschool mom, so my options are really limited. I have to say it has been hard to work at home, teach at home, be a wife and mom, be on staff at church, and still find time to take care of myself and my home. So, in that aspect I am glad I don't have the job anymore, and my husband is glad too. Now, we have to see if we can make it. Lord, we need Your help!

This major change in our income has also caused us to have to tighten up the belt in every area of the budget. One of the main ways I continued to lose weight was through eating different food than my family. And now, I can't afford to buy much of anything extra. So, that has been incredibly frustrating for me and my weight loss efforts.

Not being able to control what I buy for myself to eat has really affected my mindset. I have to fight consistently, daily, against the old eating disorder. After all, if I can't afford to eat right, it stands to reason that I would be better off not eating, right? WRONG! I find myself laying in bed at night poring over ways to keep from eating and making it okay, or eating as little as possible so that I will still be eating and be okay that way. I am battling myself, and no worries friends, I am absolutely not allowing that mindset to win. I will keep fighting.

There is more that I cannot share right now, but will probably share at a later date. I also do believe that all of this is going to aid me in writing my book. I only have one chapter completed at this point, and I can already see where some of this whole upheaval process is going to factor into my fiction.

As I close for now I just have to say that I know this has not been particularly encouraging, I just want to say honestly what I am going through. I just hope that it helps someone who reads it to know that even when we don't know, God does. We have to hold tighter to His hand and trust His guidance. He will lead us along the right path and right where we need to be.

Phillipians 3:7 NKJV
But what things were gain to me, these I have counted loss for Christ. 8 But indeed I also count all things loss for the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them as rubbish, that I may gain Christ.

Is anyone working this window?!?!?!?!

2008-04-23T16:28:00.002-05:00

Hello all! I would like to interrupt our regularly scheduled programming of ummm........... NOTHING!!!!!!

I just wanted to say that I am in the process of harassing Aprille to make sure that she posts a new blog soon. I apologize for any delay and any boredom that she may have caused you! I am sure that her intent isn't to bore us or leave us hanging.

YOOHOO Aprille!!!!!!! Where is the blog that you promised earlier today?!?!?!?!?!
We need some insight and wisdom from you!!!!!!!! LOL

Love ya!
Michelle

Unfortunately...

2008-04-14T03:18:00.004-05:00

I am 33 years old today. I am actually older than Michelle and she is just trying to make me feel better! No, seriously I don't feel bad about being 33. I know that is not truly old, except to children, adolescents, and college kids! A friend and I were talking the other day about how when we were young and we would think about 30 somethings, we would feel like that was so OLD! Ah, we were so naive! I am proud to be 33 today. Thank you, Michelle, for the birthday greetings! Michelle is making me lunch today for my birthday, so that will be a really fun treat! Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me..... :0)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY APRILLE!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-04-13T18:01:00.002-05:00

Hey everyone! This is Michelle once again. It has been a while since Aprille has posted. I am beginning to wonder if she ever will again!?!?!?!?!

Well, now to my real reason for hijacking her blog again. Monday April 14th is Aprille's birthday and I wanted to wish her a very happy 25th birthday! You are turning 25 right Aprille?!?!? LOL

So just in case you all didn't know I wanted to tell you about her birthday. Make sure you all leave her a comment and wish her a Happy Birthday!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY APRILLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I love ya!

Michelle

The New Tracker...

2008-04-04T19:58:00.002-05:00

Wow! I am loving the new weight loss tracker! I did really well on everything except for my sodium intake!!! Nearly twice as high as it should be. So obviously I have quite a ways to go on cutting back on the sodium! It's not salting my food, I didn't put any seasoning on a single thing today, but the spaghetti sauce and lunch meat, things like that are so, so high in sodium. HMMMM. Any ideas anyone? Guess I need to go with fresh meat and make my own sauce from scratch, HA! LOL! Fresh meat is really an option, but I will have to search out some low sodium spaghetti sauce. I am really, really spoiled to a certain kind, Prego, and I would hate to have to switch. Anyway, I feel really good about today! YAY! This is so helpful. I hope that you will all try it! Have a great weekend!

Day 1 of a Very Precise Weight Loss Journal...

2008-04-04T19:53:00.004-05:00

			Free Calorie Calculator my-calorie-counter.com
			Cal	Fat	Sat	Chl	Sod	Crb	Fib	Sug	Pro
Breakfast
0.5	pita, large (6-1/2" dia)	Bread, pita, whole-wheat	85	1	0	0	170	18	2	0	3
1	large	Egg, whole, cooked, scrambled	102	7	2	215	171	1	0	1	7
1	fl oz	Coffee, instant, regular, prepared with water	1	0	0	0	1	0	0	0	0
2	1 tbls(15 ml)	Nestle Coffee Mate French Vanilla Sugar Free Creamer	30	2	0	0	10	0	0	0	0
1	tbsp	Salad dressing, KRAFT MIRACLE WHIP LIGHT Dressing	37	3	0	4	131	2	0	2	0
			255	13	2	219	483	21	2	3	10
Lunch
1	cup	Spaghetti, whole-wheat, cooked	174	1	0	0	4	37	6	1	7
1	Serving - 85 G	LOUIS KEMP SEAFOOD CO. - LOBSTER DELIGHTS - CHUNK STYLE 8 OZ TRAY	70	0	0	5	400	11	1	5	7
3	tbsp	Sauce, PREGO 100% Natural Spaghetti Sauce, Traditional, jar	205	8	2	0	839	31	6	16	3
			449	9	2	5	1243	79	13	22	17
Dinner
2	slice	Entrees, pizza with pepperoni	362	14	4	28	534	40	0	0	20
0.5	Serving - 33 G	ORVILLE REDENBACHER'S - MICROWAVE POPCORN - ULTIMATE BUTTER 3.5 OZ 3 PK BOX	80	6	1	0	220	8	2	0	1
1	serving	LOUIS RICH, Turkey Breast (Smoked, Carving Board)	42	0	0	19	540	1	0	0	9
			484	20	5	47	1294	49	2	0	30
Snack
2	1 tbls(15 ml)	Nestle Coffee Mate French Vanilla Sugar Free Creamer	30	2	0	0	10	0	0	0	0
1	fl oz	Coffee, instant, regular, prepared with water	1	0	0	0	1	0	0	0	0
1	Serving - 32 G	JIF - PEANUT BUTTER - CREAMY 28 OZ PLASTIC JAR	190	16	3	0	150	7	2	3	8
1	cup, quartered or chopped	Apples, raw, with skin	65	0	0	0	1	17	3	13	0
1	1 cup 8 fl oz 240 mL	Einstein Bros Bagels® - Hot Tea, Peppermint	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	0
			286	18	3	0	162	24	5	16	8
Water Tracker

Totals Target Balance			1474 2000 74 526	60 65 92 5	12 20 60 8	271 300 90 29	3182 2400 133 782	173 300 58 127	22 25 88 3	41 50 82 9	65 50 130 15

			Cal	Fat	Sat	Chl	Sod	Crb	Fib	Sug	Pro
Activity
0.5	hour(s)	walking - walking, 5.0 mph	-369
Totals			-369

A New Tool For Weight Loss...

2008-04-04T10:41:00.004-05:00

I googled "calorie counter" today on the web and got quite a few things to choose from, and I'm sharing this link with you to a site I am really crazy about...

http://www.my-calorie-counter.com/calorie_counter.asp

This is a free journal site, where you can put in exactly what you eat and they calculate the calories, sodium, etc., water intake, your weight, height, activity each day (even down to housework!) It is really cool! Each day I will be trying to post my journal on my blog to show you exactly what my intake is and how my progress is going. I have put my food journal on here in the past, but this is very precise and gives me a better handle on exactly how much I have taken in. I will be posting it at the end of the day after my calculation is complete, and you can see what is working for me and what is not. BUT, I hope that you all will try this site out, I think it is going to be very beneficial!

Happy tracking everyone...

The Fruit On My Tree...

2008-04-01T11:13:00.010-05:00

This past weekend I went to a women's conference in Memphis with our pastor's wife, Misty, and Michelle. We went to hear Joyce Meyer for the second time in six months. It was so awesome to hear her speak to us as if she knew exactly what we were going through and dealing with. And you know what? She didn't know. God did. God used her, his open and willing vessel, to speak truth to our hearts that would transform us, that would keep us from leaving there the same people that arrived there.

She talked a lot about the fruit we produce, and how we as Christians are really "branches" hanging on the "vine" (Jesus). She made such a simple, yet profound point, that really struck home with me - the branch on the tree does not have to try to produce fruit. When it is rooted in the tree, the branch receives everything it needs from the tree and just naturally produces the right "fruit" without any effort. If I am a branch on an orange tree, I will receive all that I need from the tree, all of my life comes from the tree, and in the right season I will automatically produce my fruit, oranges, without any effort because I am rooted in and receiving from the tree.

So, what are our "fruits" to be as Christians? In Galatians 5:22 God says that the fruits of His Spirit are Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, AND (last, but not least) Self-Control. It would be easy to stop at this point and say, well, I need to pray and seek God more so that I will produce these things. But, we can't stop reading at that verse. If you read down a little further into verse 24 it says "Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. 25 Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. 26 Let us not become conceited, provoking, and envying each other."

OOOOOO, that is good stuff. So, if we (the branches) hang on the tree we should automatically produce the right fruit, right? But, we cannot, as the branches of this tree, still try to live separate from the tree. We have to daily crucify our flesh, our sinful nature, our passions and desires, and get in step with His Spirit. If we are a branch on the tree and long to be separate from the tree and do what WE want to do in the flesh, what will happen? We will die spiritually. Our life comes from the tree, and if we are not rooted and grounded completely and totally in the tree, we will fall away like an old twig on the ground, which is dead and snaps right in two. A live branch on a tree is hard to break because it is flexible, it bends when the wind blows, but doesn't break under pressure. When the storms of life come if we are rooted and grounded, and strongly attached to the tree, we may bend and be tossed about, but we will not break because our life comes from the tree.

As I had my devotion time this morning, I was reading 1 Thessalonians 4 and just kept on going into chapter 5 and as I read down into vs. 5 and going all the way into verse 8 it was talking about being sons of light and sons of the day. We do not belong to the night or darkness. Verse 6 says "So then, let us not be like others, who are asleep, but let us be alert and self-controlled. 7 For those who sleep, sleep at night, and those who get drunk, get drunk at night. 8 But since we belong to the day, let us be self-controlled, putting on faith and love as a breastplate, and the hope of salvation as a helmet."

Do you see a recurring theme here? I was not searching this out, God is leading me to it. He taught me (and a few thousand others...) about the fruit we bear this weekend, and then Sunday our pastor (not having been at the conference) talked about our life coming from us being rooted and grounded in Jesus, and when we are not deeply rooted in Him we will wilt and die, and then this morning I read this in 1 Thessalonians about self-control, and the devotion/study page in my bible was titled "Fruity Folks" with the scripture reference being Galatians 5:22 and talking all about the fruit we bear! I do believe God is trying to teach me something here!!!

So, I have asked myself, and would challenge you today to ask yourself, what kind of fruit am I bearing? Am I trying to bear the right fruit, but trying to do it on my own without truly being rooted in God, or am I actually bearing the right fruit just by hanging on the tree and receiving my life from Him to where I cannot help but produce the right fruit?

Don't Put Off Today...

2008-03-26T22:47:00.006-05:00

Hello.... here I am!!! Posting again finally!!! I actually got on here to post earlier, and when I opened up my blog I found that it had been hijacked AGAIN by Little Ms. Michelle. Soooooo, I immediately had to turn around and go hijack her blog (which was the first time for me!). So fun. But now, back to business, the business of writing my own blog!

I do have to say that I have been doing okay, Michelle said I had been doing so good and had given her a pair of my jeans that I had undergrown. But, in fact, I am up three pounds from what I had gotten down to. So, that is not so good. But I am still hanging in there and keeping on, but have to be honest with you in the fact that I have gone up a little.

I have felt like things have just been so out of control lately. My job is almost gone, but I had taken some extra work over a couple of weeks, and compiling that with all of the other stuff I have already going on, I have been feeling really overwhelmed. I have always been the type of person who will avoid dealing with something if it can be put off. The Queen of Procrastination, I suppose. Whether it was dealing with my weight, which has taken me years to finally begin really dealing with, or with my finances, or with things being organized, or just whatever - even putting off the dishes from supper to deal with the next day when I would have a fresh start the next day if I would just take the time to do them right away. Craziness this is to most people, but this is the way my life has been for a long time.

Well, a couple of weeks ago I lost my keys in a parking lot after church and thought I knew where they were, but it turned out they were not there. I returned to the town and to the parking lot where I assumed they had been lost, and no one had turned them in, and they were nowhere to be found. I was panicking pretty good over it, not because of my house keys or car keys (we live in a different town after all), but I was upset because the church keys were on the ring and it was just right down the road from where I lost my keys. Not only were the church keys on the ring, but the name of the church was on the keychain next to those keys. So, I thought somebody could just get into our church without really "breaking and entering" because I had not been responsible with my things. I know people lose their keys every day, but this is just such a common occurrence for me it is ridiculous. Michelle was very sympathetic and said she would help me look for them, even going to the next town with me, but she was very truthful with me (and it was a hard truth) as we drove over there. She told me that she thought that my chaotic way of life was coming to a head for me because God was trying to work some things out of me. She said that all she kept hearing when she had been praying was "Revelation and Transformation", and she thought that was key for me. She knew that I had the revelation of how I needed to change things, but was not allowing God to transform me. I received this, and was ready to move on. I told Michelle that my library card was on my keys and that maybe someone would turn them in to the library (in a different town), and the very next day I called the library to tell them that I had lost the keys with my card on them. I went to Wal-Mart to make duplicates of my keys, and while I was leaving with my new keys I received a call from the library letting me know that someone had indeed turned my keys in to them. I now know exactly which pocket of my purse my keys are to be in at all times, and when they are not in my purse they are clipped onto my person with a heart-shaped clip purchased at Fred's Dollar Store for about $1.00. So I allowed transformation in that area of my life, but there was more to come.

The next thing is more on a personal note and I will not give the details, but suffice it to say that Michelle was repeating many of the same words to me because the same situation was applying as in the previous couple of weeks. I was stuck in an old pattern of behavior/bad habit that had proven time and again to be destructive for me. This time she told me something, and she said she wanted me to hear it not from her, but to really receive it from God...she told me that if I did not get past this stuff and allow God to transform me, then I would not be able to get to the next level with him and would remain stagnant. So, once again, I am being transformed. It is not easy, but even though it can be difficult it is amazing to me how God has been giving me creative ideas and giving me strength to become what He is wanting me to be.

It was so funny that when I went to pray this morning as I was making the bed, I was struck with the thought of how I consistently talk to God and never give Him time to talk back. I know it is not God's will for my life to be full of chaos, and if I will listen He will show me exactly how to get my life where it needs to be for Him, and to get me on the right track to being what He would have me to be.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, no matter how badly you may want to put something off, no matter how badly you may not want to face something, that won't make it go away.

Not getting the scale out will not make you weigh less...
Not cleaning the closet out will not make it organize itself...
Not opening up that dreaded bill will not keep it from going to collections...
Not spending time with God will not get you close to Him...

So, rather than sweeping everything under the rug like you would usually do (or like I would usually do actually!), deal with the things that need to be dealt with. Ignoring things just causes you to get behind and overwhelmed, to be stressed and unproductive, and many times - just unpleasant to be around. Pray each day for God to show you how you can do your very best in all that you do, and how to deal with the things you face each day in the best way possible. He is faithful, just give it to Him.

That is what I'm having to do.

Thank you, Michelle and Misty, for all of your prayers and support, and for always telling me the truth even when it is hard for you to say and you know it will be hard for me to hear. You have all the marks of true friends.

Yoo-Hoooooooooo

2008-03-25T20:12:00.002-05:00

Hey Aprille!!! Just wondering if you are ever gonna post again?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?

Hey everyone in Aprille's blogdom. I just wanted you all to know that she is doing GREAT! I see her just about every day and she has just been really busy. She is doing so good that she has been able to pass down a pair of her jeans to me that had gotten too big for her!! I am not far behind her but it was great getting new clothes!! Thanks Aprille!

Love ya!
Michelle

A New Day, A New Me...

2008-03-18T20:34:00.004-05:00

Well, this is my second post for today, and I had said that I was going to go easy on the salt today. So, my intentions were good and the day ended up good, but I was at the beauty shop this morning - ALL MORNING! - and here is what happened...

No breakfast before going to the shop, no coffee since 3:20 or so this morning. Oh, and lots of water. So by the time I got out of the beauty shop around 1:00, I guess (my appointment was at 9:00), I was starving!!! Don't get me wrong though, they cut my hair and my daughter's, and colored mine, and I am so, SO happy with it! I ended up having a diet Coke while at the shop, not all of it, my daughter drank most of it for me, but sodium there. No biggie, right? When I went to pick up my son at Michelle's house, Noelle and I were both ravenous. Michelle had food for Noelle for lunch, and offered me some. I ate a delicious Tyson chicken tender - it was sooooo good, it could have come from O'Charley's as far as I was concerned! Then I had some creamy chicken enchiladas - little different from traditional, as you use salsa instead of enchilada sauce, and she used Velveeta instead of cheddar, and it was DELISH! I had two of those. I also had a really, really tiny bit of coke - my son finished that! After coming home I had some raw carrots, much better and closer to my plan for the day! I also had a cup of coffee and some more water. Could not get enough water today, it was so good. For supper I had a baked tilapia filet with no-salt lemon pepper seasoning, Yummy! For a side I had steamed veggies - broccoli, cauliflower, and carrots. I did add a postage stamp size bit of regular salted butter. It was all so good. Now it is nearly 9:00 pm and I just had a cup of Suisse Mocha from GFIC, and it was the perfect end to the day. All in all, I think it was a good day. I told Michelle as I ate the chicken tender at 1:00 that that was my breakfast, and then the enchiladas were my lunch - I just ate them together. It worked!

I am posting a pic of my new hairdo, I feel like a new woman with it. Also, check out Michelle's Walking My Way to Health blog to see her new do, very nice! We had two good days of "pampering" for us!

Pass ON the salt please...

2008-03-18T02:53:00.005-05:00

SALT should be a four-letter word! I feel so absolutely BLOATED right now, and do you want to know why? I am so glad that you do because I am about to tell you. BECAUSE OF MY SODIUM INTAKE! UUUUGGHH!

First, let me say that I am not a big "salter." Unlike my husband, I don't get a plate of food and salt it as soon as I see it, especially before I even taste it (except for eggs - I like to season them!). Here at our house we switched from salt to No Salt a long time ago. No Salt is nothing but potassium - 600 mg per serving. It takes a little bit more to get the taste you're looking for, but hey - it's potassium. So, we think we are doing so well because of using this.

...............well, maybe not so good. Yesterday I ate really well. I was at my friend's house watching her kids and was getting desperate for some food, so I had a few bites of snack food that were not exactly health food. But, it was only a few bites. The rest of my day consisted of the following... I ate popcorn (DO NOT BUY POP SECRET POPCORN - IT IS LOADED WITH TRANS FAT!!!), and of course, I seasoned it - extra salt there. It's not a "salt" that I'm putting on there, but it has salt in it. It's actually a seasoning for Mexican food - and is outstanding on popcorn. Anyway, I had half of a whole wheat bread sandwich with one slice of ham - loaded with sodium...I had a bowl of homemade vegetable soup - LOADED with sodium...I had a tuna fillet with teriyaki sauce on the side which was (you guessed it) loaded with sodium.

So, this is how my day went. I thought I was doing okay, but maybe not so much. I am typing this at 3:02 am (taking a break from my work), and my fingers feel puffy, my whole body feels fit to bust!

My plan for today is to allow some of this sodium to get out of me, some of this extra water weight I'm carrying right now. I will be skipping the popcorn today. For those of you who have been following for a while you know that I could eat spaghetti EVERY DAY!!! It is whole wheat spaghetti with sauce containing no meat, but do you know what dirty little secret spaghetti sauce is hiding - LOADS OF SODIUM!!! UUUUUGGGHHH!!! So, no spaghetti for me today. I am going to the store to get some frozen veggies, as they are not loaded with salt, and most of the canned ones are. I have already had about 16 oz of water so far and a cup of coffee. I know that sounds backwards if you're trying to get rid of water weight, but when your body is in surplus of water, it knows it can get rid of some. If you deprive yourself of water, your body retains it. So, I hope to feel much better by the end of this day, much less puffy.

As you go to fix supper or as you go to the store to get your groceries, be conscious of the fact that you may get what looks like healthy food, but it may be loaded with sodium. Not only is sodium good at making you retain water, but it is also good at causing your blood pressure to go up. Don't just grab something off of the shelf because it looks like a healthy option, be sure and check out the ingredients and nutritional info. There are so many alternatives out there now of foods that say "unsalted" or "reduced sodium", etc. So next time you sit down to eat, instead of saying "pass the salt please", say "I think I will pass on the salt, thanks!"

A fun day in the snow...

2008-03-08T15:32:00.008-06:00

We got the very, VERY RARE snow here finally! It started yesterday evening, and we got enought to play in and make a snowman with! We didn't make a very tall snowman, but it still took a while, and I think it came out looking really cute! It was such a fun time, and the kids were SOOOOO excited about it all! It was just really great to have a time for our whole family to get out and get to do something together. We got to last weekend too with our kite-flying day.

Be sure and get out and spend time with your family. It makes you feel so wonderful to get that bonding time and to make wonderful memories that you can remember for the rest of your life!

Some new pictures...

2008-03-07T09:56:00.010-06:00

Okay, this is my second post for today, the first one is what I said, this one is just for pictures!!! FUN! My children are just so BEAUTIFUL!!! I love them so much!

Strength to keep going...

2008-03-07T09:53:00.002-06:00

I just want to start today's post by being very honest with you about how I'm feeling right now...

I WANT SOMETHING SWEET TO EAT!!!!!!!!

Ahhh, now I feel much better. Thanks for letting me get that off of my chest. I have not had breakfast yet this morning and it is already 9:30, but that is not the only reason I am craving something sweet. I have been wanting something since yesterday. I think in a little while I am going to have some SF/FF pudding (sugar-free/fat-free). YUM! But first, I need some coffee, and I may completely feel differently after that!

The past few days I have eaten really good. I'm not listing the entire menu because I have not restarted my journal yet. I will restart it today. My Microsoft Word program on my computer expired, so I don't have access to my old journal anymore, but I am starting a new one on Microsoft Works now. But I have had popcorn each day, which is a staple for me, and lots of water (with SF flavoring!), I have eaten tuna two out of the last three days, one day I had a hamburger steak with cheese (YUM!) - I was really feeling the need for some iron that day, I have had some eggs, whole wheat pita (pocket) bread, and some whole wheat spaghetti. And, of course, I have had peanut butter. I'm not sure at this point that I would even know how to go through a day without peanut butter. I LOVE IT!

Anyway, the eating is going well, but I have not been working out, so I have not been seeing any progress now, just staying where I'm at for now. I will absolutely be starting the workout back up though, I really don't think I can expect to see any more progress until I do.

I just want to say at this point that if you're trying to get healthy, KEEP GOING!!! It does not matter how you have been eating or what kind of exercise you have or have not been doing. What matters is today, and then tomorrow, and then the next day. It would be easy when we messed up to keep going backwards, to keep eating candy, to keep overlooking that exercise video ( as I have been doing :0( ), but why stop now? The decisions we have made yesterday and in the past weeks and months are gone, they are done, and you can't go back. What is important is making the right choices today for your future. It's easy to say "this day of binging will not really cost me in the long run, as long as I do better tomorrow", but the question is will we be able to stop when tomorrow comes.

Make the best choices, the best decisions, that you can NOW. Each meal, each day, each hour, each minute, is one small step closer to a healthier and happier you! And when you feel like you're not strong enough, ask Jesus for strength to resist temptation. It may seem like too small a thing to ask Him to help you with, but He absolutely cares about all of the little things, and He wants to help us to be the best He made us to be!

Let's go back to the past.........

2008-03-04T14:58:00.005-06:00

Hey everyone. Michelle comin to ya once again! Aprille has no idea I am posting so, Aprille I PROMISE I will not post again without your permission. Well, not unless I have something good to tell! LOL

Now to my post. I wanted to share some pictures of me and Aprille from the year of 1994 or 1995 I'm not really sure the exact year. Maybe when Aprille checks in she can correct me on the year. Anywho, Aprille and I had gone to St. Louis to visit my mom for the weekend and gone to Six Flags and a Cardinals game. It was my first trip like this without family and we had a BLAST!

So these pictures are pre-marriage and pre-baby for both of us. I don't think we will ever get this small again but hey we sure can try!!! Just wanted you to see some REAL before pictures of both of us. We really thought we were cute too! ha,ha,ha

So my words of wisdom for today are:

If you have given your password out to a friend, CHANGE YOUR PASSWORD!!!!!!

Us at Six Flags.

Us just being cute!

Us at the Cardinals game.

Kite-flying day! 3-2-08

2008-03-04T06:00:00.008-06:00

Jordan is flying his kite in the pic to the left, Noelle is in the pic above, standing by watching and posing while he is busy, and the pic at the very top is of Jordan and Noelle playing on the swingset after we were done with the kites, only one of which worked well! It was a fun time though!

More pics from photo shoot day

2008-03-03T10:36:00.005-06:00

Hey everyone, this is Aprille's friend Michelle coming to ya! Her computer has been messing up and she has had a hard time fixing her blog so she gave me free reign to post!!! He,he,he! Very brave Aprille. I had threatened that if she didn't hurry up and blog something that I would get her password and tell everyone she had gained 50 pounds and that is why she isn't blogging! What a GREAT friend I am. ;^)

But that is so not true. For those of you who don't get the privelage to see her regularly she is doing great on her weight loss and is shrinking right in front of our eyes!!! Great job Aprille!!

Michelle's update:

Oh and I wanted to say that since my stomach virus that Aprille told you about, I have lost another pound so that is 11 pounds lost for me! YAY

So here are some pictures of Aprille and her kids and me and my little girl Amber. Hope you all enjoy following her weight loss, and now that I have her password maybe I will just start posting my updates on here as well (see above) LOL

So my words of wisdom for today are:

NEVER give your password out to someone who you can't trust. You never know what they will say! Until next time........ HE,HE,HE

More pics...

2008-03-02T17:29:00.007-06:00

My sweethearts and me on Feb. 20, 2008, the day that Michelle and I were photographing our progress. Check out her blog too, the link is listed here as "Michelle's Tidbits". She has lost ten pounds, possibly more now thanks to a bout of the stomach virus! YUCK! Congratulations, Michelle!

Oh, and this is my second post for today. Scroll down for the first one...

Here I Am!!!

2008-03-02T16:59:00.007-06:00

HELLO!!!! I have been off of here for such a long time! So here is a picture of my progress. In the pic I'm wearing the same clothes I wore in my "before" pic,

but now I actually have.......

(are you ready for this???)...............

A WAISTLINE!!!

So anyway, things got a little crazy with me working on my computer again. So, I had to switch to my boss' computer for a while, and it was really hard trying to do much of anything on the internet with it because I would get cut off a lot, etc. So, finally I am back on my computer and hopefully will be able to use it for the remainder of the time that I am doing this job!

Things are going well. But I do have to be honest and tell you have really, really been struggling with my cravings. Between Valentine's Day and my daughter's birthday, it's been quite scary! I have been craving sweets like nobody's business! And now, every time I go to the store there is this whole BIG EASTER section of junk, junk, and more junk - the junkiest of the junk being Reese's anything - and believe me, they have everything - Reese's hearts, Reese's trees, Reese's eggs (how is a person supposed to escape this type of temptation???), and then there is the CADBURY EGG. Let me just say that the Cadbury Egg should be banned, should be deported, and quite possibly should be the 11th commandment. THOU SHALT NOT EAT THE CADBURY EGG!!! Because there is seriously nothing, and I mean nothing, good about the gooey confection (good for you, that is). It is one of my major pitfalls this time of year. And that is my confession for the day.

And as my friend, Michelle, would say, "My words of wisdom for today are..."

STAY AWAY FROM THE EASTER CANDY SECTION!

LOL! Okay, so really allow yourself one egg, maybe one egg from Reese's and one from Cadbury, but force yourself to stay away from the other stuff...

So, as a result of feeling so tempted all the time, I am placing myself on another fast. I have got to absolutely get this JUNK out of my system. But, not just for the sake of my physical, I'm feeling the need spiritually. I have never fasted so much in my life as I have since I have been at this church, but what a difference it makes. I was thinking on my way home how I was needing to go on one. It is really a spiritual bodybuilder.

So, starting Monday morning I will be starting on a new fast, with dual purpose, and I would challenge anyone to do it with me. Maybe you would even choose this season to completely let Easter come and go without the candy...it's not about that anyway. It's about Jesus. Our focus is all wrong on all of the holidays these days. Let's teach our kids that Christmas is about Jesus, not presents and Santa Claus, and that Easter is about his Resurrection, not a bunny bringing colored eggs. Those other things are fun, but really tend to take away from the real reason we even have these holidays, Jesus Christ, who sacrificed everything for us to have abundant life, healthy life, the best life we could ever dream of.

I've Been Tagged!

2008-02-10T15:28:00.000-06:00

Okay, if you are just checking out my blog today, then scroll down to my first post for today, which is my weight loss post - then read this one, which is just for FUN! YAY!

I was tagged by my good friend, Michelle! Love you girl!

A: The rules of the game are posted at the beginning.

B: Each player answers the questions about themselves.

C: At the end of the post, the player then tags 3 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know that they have been tagged and asking them to read your blog.

10 Years Ago:I was...
22 years old, I was a newlywed! I had not even been married a month yet! My husband and I lived in Nashville. He worked as a produce manager at Albertson's, and I worked as a tour guide at the Country Music Hall of Fame & Museum. We went to Harpeth Heights Baptist Church and I sang in a group called "The Church Band" (creative, huh?). We lived in a one bedroom apartment, I drove a Saturn and my hubbby drove a Mustang. We lived one mile from the mall and shopped entirely too much. We didn't have any pets, as there were no pets allowed in the apartment, although there was a flock of ducks that lived there for everyone to feed!

Things on my to-do list today:
1. Church
2. Lunch
3. Clean house, organizing stuff and finishing cleaning the kitchen
4. Supper
5. Type reports for clinic

What I would do if I were suddenly made a billionaire:
I would buy a new building for my church and a new facility for the FreeWill Shelter- or quite possibly the entire city of Humboldt (HA!), buy a new house, buy my husband a Corvette, buy myself a new vehicle of some sort, a swimming pool with a big slide for the kids, along with the house would have a great big shop/garage for my husband, a huge lavish pen for our dog. I would publish my own book and make a CD. I would buy horses, my kids would each have one, and a donkey or two. I would pay off my stepdaughter's house and their cars, or get them new ones, and buy my stepson a house and car too. I would set up an account to completely pay for Jordan and Noelle's college, and also college for the grandson that is on his way in a few months! I would pay for the house my parents want to build on their farm and would buy them new cars too. I would buy a house on the beach in Corpus Christi for vacations.

Three of my bad habits:
1. biting my fingernails - my kids fuss at me for this...
2. not being organized in much of anything, but getting there slowly!
3. procrastinating :0(

Three places I have lived:
1. Springfield, MO
2. Milan, TN
3. Nashville, TN

Five jobs that I have had:
1. Waitress/hostess at Shoney's
2. Medical Transcriptionist
3. Tour Guide
4. Receptionist
5. Homeschool Mom (you're right Michelle, this is the best ever!)

Five Things people don't know about me:
1. I have no appendix.
2. I love mac and cheese and pork and beans....mixed together...
3. I can drive a stick shift
4. I have ridden an elephant
5. I used to sing during the tours I gave, at restaurants, at bars, and just really anywhere I could, in Nashville

I would like to tag:
Jeni-my dear friend since childhood
Tracey-my dear friend of 11 years
Tobey-my dear friend from church

This was SO FUN!

Wise Decisions...Day 42

2008-02-10T13:22:00.000-06:00

Well, over a week of boot camp is done now and I think things are going really well! Yesterday I had planned on getting to spend a lot of time outside and going walking, etc., but instead I ended up doing lots of housework, organizing the kids school stuff, that sort of thing - I even got a nap in (nice!). But I still got some exercise and had a really good day. Here's how it went...

Day 42
Saturday, February 9, 2008

B - Scrambled eggs

Workout - yoga video

S - popcorn
L - Vegetable beef soup
S - this is a weird snack, but here it is - Hot and spicy tuna and whole wheat spaghetti/sc/chs.
S- Chicken and broccoli stir fry w/ brown rice.

I really, really recommend taking your measurements when you get started with a healthy lifestyle. Even if you aren't seeing a big difference in the pounds, you sometimes can see a significant change in your inches. I finally checked my measurements today and I have lost a total of .......

Eleven and a quarter inches!!!

That is total body inches lost - hips, bust, waist, upper arms, and thighs. YAY! That was very exciting!

Another thing that is really important, in everything we do, is to get up and commit your day to God. Ask Him for strength and wisdom to make good decisions in what you eat and all that you do. Commit to take care of what God has given you. Remember, we only get this one body, we need to take the best care possible of it!

Matthew 7:7-8 NIV

"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened."

Just Do It!...Days 40 & 41

2008-02-08T22:20:00.000-06:00

Yay! It's finally Friday!!! And God has truly blessed us for the past two weeks. There have been blessings here and there scattered throughout, some big, some small - all significant and meaningful, and we are ever so grateful. One of the really huge blessings is just being kept safe during the storms that passed through this week on Tuesday and Wednesday, and our family and friends were safe also. What a blessing! Many people lost their lives, lost loved ones, and lost everything they had in the world, so we have so very much to be thankful for in that the storms passed us by. Thank you Jesus!

I am also thankful because I am now down

27 pounds!!!

It has been really good to see this extra work paying off! I have really been craving some potato chips and french fries (carbs anyone?), but it is a much better trade-off when I step on the scale in the morning and see the number going down, down, down...

So, here is how the past two days went...

Day 41

Thursday, February 7

B - Scrambled eggs

S - Popcorn

L - Half sandwich on whole wheat and whole wheat spaghetti/sc/chs

S - Salad w/lobster delights, one fruit leather

S - Vegetable beef soup

Workout - Miracle Mile with Leslie Sansone

Day 42

Friday, February 8.

B - None (on the run!)

S - None (STARVING...)

L - Late lunch, but FINALLY SOME FOOD! Turkey sandwich on whole wheat, salad

S - popcorn

S - Tuna steak (sushi grade - YUM!) whole wheat spaghetti/sauce/chs

Workout - Miracle Mile with Leslie Sansone, extra workout time on my own - crunches, push-ups, stretches. I upped my Miracle Mile workout by using hand weights - NO PROBLEM! :-)

I am really pleased with the progress made during the "boot camp" so far and I am looking forward to seeing how it goes this week! Tomorrow the weather is supposed to be beautiful and I am looking forward to a walk with my kids tomorrow, maybe even moving up to some jogging. I was doing some jogging even at my highest weight, but once the weather got cold I just started staying in. It is hard enough to get my kids to hang in there with me, much less drag them around the track or the block freezing cold and bored to boot! Anyway, it'll be nice when spring arrives because I can get a little more variety in my workout and get some real quality time with my children! I can't wait!

I didn't do my workout until tonight after the kids went to bed, and to be honest I didn't really want to do it at all. So, I just want to say that it is worth it to take a little while to exercise. I wanted to go to bed and just rest, but instead I went ahead and did the work because I needed to, because I had committed to do it, because I am setting a good example for my family, and because it is GOOD FOR ME! After I was done, I felt energized, rejuvenated - it was definitely worth it.

When you least want to take the time to exercise don't give in, don't give up, don't make excuses and find reasons not to do the work. Taking the time to take care of your body instead of just neglecting what you need for your health is going to make you feel so much better than laying down and watching a movie and skipping the workout. Getting up 30 minutes earlier to work out can really help you get a good energy boost for your morning. Find time, take the time, make the time, JUST DO IT!!! You'll be so glad you did!

Catching up!...Days 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, & 40

2008-02-07T09:09:00.000-06:00

Hi! I'm back! Sorry for the absence again! It is not because I have been eating badly, really!

Friday my husband was home from work sick. That was my first day of boot camp. I also had to work that day and we had praise and worship practice, and I had to go to do errands and go to the store. Sooooo, I did not get to work out, but I got a lot of walking in - very disappointing nonetheless for the first day of boot camp. I ate really well though anyway. Saturday my parents came to work on our house. My mom and I spent quite a bit of time at the store, and my husband, dad, and son worked outside on the back room of our house. However, I did get my workout in while my mom was here. She even did some of it with me! Sunday we were gone nearly ALL DAY at church. It was our first Sunday to have the early service, so my day started at 5:21 am! WOOO! My husband had McDonald's for breakfast and even tried really hard to get me to eat some, but I DIDN'T DO IT! Woo, talk about resisting temptation!

I put on my last post that I would be allowing myself to enjoy the Souper Bowl party, and I did. I got to have different types of soup - chili, vegetable beef, creamy chicken w/rice, tortilla soup - I did not eat the tortilla chips, but did have some crackers with other soup, and I had a dessert bar - chocolate chunk cookie bar - YUM! Monday mom was here, so I didn't get time to blog, but did have time to eat well and get my workout in. Tuesday and Wednesday I just didn't blog, no real reason, other than just knowing how much I had to catch up.

So anyway, here is the update...

I am now down

a total of

26 pounds!!!

Day 35
Friday, February 1

B - Honey Bunches of Oats cereal/skim milk
Can't remember lunch - think I skipped it...
S - Shrimp cocktail and green beans

No workout

Day 36
Saturday, February 2

B - Scrambled eggs
S - lemon meringue yogurt (yoplait)
L - Hot and Spicy tuna, whole wheat spaghetti/sauce/chs.
S - popcorn
S - imitation crab legs, green beans

workout - Miracle Mile with Leslie Sansone

Day 37
Sunday, February 3

B - Honey Bunches of Oats
S - None
L - salmon w/honey BBQ glaze, green beans
S - small bowl of veggie soup w/ crackers, popcorn
S - lots of soup (as listed in paragraph at top), dessert bar (cookie bar, not dessert buffet!)

No workout

Day 38
Monday, February 4

B - scrambled eggs
S- none
L - vegetable beef soup (this is made with lean roast meat, not ground)
S - popcorn
S - imitation crab legs, salad

workout - yoga video

Day 39
Tuesday, February 5

workout - Miracle Mile w/Leslie Sansone

B - popcorn
S - Yoplait blueberry yogurt
L - vegetable beef soup
S - slice of cheese, few peanuts
S - imitation lobster, salad

Day 40
Wednesday, February 6

workout - Miracle Mile w/Leslie Sansone

B - scrambled eggs
S - popcorn
L - vegetable soup
S - peanuts
S - half club sandwich on whole wheat. I could not decide what to have with this, so I just had a small bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats.

2nd workout - yoga video

Now, I do have to say this. I really like the yoga video, I have always liked yoga so much because it is so good for your body. I have noticed that my lower back has stopped hurting now, maybe because this helps me to get it stretched out better. I had gotten my monthly magazine in the mail from Joyce Meyer, and in the fitness section they had recommended yoga. They do not, however, recommend the religious part of yoga, nor do I. At the end of a yoga session, as you relax from your workout, usually a yogi will tell you all of these affirmations about yourself. It is not wrong to have some confidence, but I believe that our strength comes from Jesus. So, when I got to the end of the video and the instructor said "I acknowledge myself...", I just said "I acknowledge Jesus..." Then last night when I did the video I laid next to our little heater, which blows heat like a fan, and I couldn't even hear her say those things. One thing about yoga is I get a fantastic workout and actually stay cold through most of the workout rather than breaking a sweat. Then again, I'm not doing power yoga either, which is much faster paced and more strenuous. The point is that that the stretches and postures you have to hold while doing yoga is really great for your body, and really helps you to be sure that you are breathing right while you are exercising, but we should not be "meditating" on anything other than Jesus and His word.

So if you want to try yoga and are doing a video, turn the volume down at the end as you wind down, or just replace those thoughts of "me, me, me", and turn them to Jesus. Give him thanks for all of the blessings in your life, for a new day, for your family, and most of all - for His love.

Pressing on...Day 34

2008-02-01T07:39:00.000-06:00

Here is how yesterday went...

Thursday, January 31

B - None
S - Boiled egg w/miracle whip, slice of ham (lunch meat), cheddar cheese, and one pickle
L - Chicken fritters, baked french fries, mac and chs.
S - peanuts
S - Spaghetti w/french bread, lemon cookies

So now my pre-boot camp day of food enjoyment is over...J/K! The food was really good, but I will actually have good food while in the "boot camp". I had white spaghetti, white bread, some cookies for dessert, I had mac & chs, you know the real comfort food kind of stuff. But I just have to say that at the end of each of those meals (lunch and supper) I felt totally and completely crappy! It was good at first, but it took about five minutes for me to start feeling yucky and sluggish, and I absolutely had to fight myself to not go purge! That is one thing I will not do, no matter what I have eaten. I will have to deal with the consequences of my meal choices each time and will not take the easy way out by "purging" myself. I wanted to enjoy some things before I started this today, but found that it just wasn't worth it. It was not worth the way I felt. I wish I had just stuck with the things I know work for me healthwise and keep me feeling energetic and healthy.

But I messed up two meals yesterday - yes, two meals. And do you know what that means?? All it means is that yesterday is over and it is a new day today. It DOES NOT MATTER what your food choices were yesterday because today is a brand new day that you make new choices in, and you can make good choices. Commit to make good choices today! Don't spend time beating yourself up over the past, whether it is food or anything else. I have done that for too long, and it is time to realize the past is the past, and get on with living your best TODAY, and then TOMORROW, etc. Don't get stuck in those past mistakes, they're just not worth it. God wants us to press on to be the best that we can be.

Boot Camp...Day 33

2008-01-30T22:49:00.000-06:00

Well, it has been a good day today! Here is how things went...

Wednesday, January 30

workout - Leslie Sansone Miracle Mile
B - popcorn/spoon of peanut butter
S - none
L - few bites of mac & chs. and chicken pot pie
S - piece of cheese
S - scallops (fried in butter flav cooking spray and lemon/pepper - not bad, also not my favorite), whole wheat pasta/sauce/chs., and green beans

I have had a really bad headache for the better part of the afternoon and into tonight, so when I got home I had to take some medicine and did not want to do so on an empty stomach. I had a mug of Lipton noodle soup - and I feel like I'm about to bust! Head feels some better though.

So, I am trying something a little bit tough for the next two weeks!!! Yes, two weeks! Are you ready for this???

Are you really ready...

Okay, here goes...

I am going to do a "boot camp" for the next two weeks. It will consist of the following:

Absolutely nothing but HEALTHY food, i.e., salads, vegetables, fish, lean meats, skim milk (if any), fruit. I will allow myself peanut butter, but only when accompanied by a fruit. ONLY whole wheat bread - and you can say that it is the same to eat just WHEAT bread, but it is absolutely NOT THE SAME! Unless it says WHOLE WHEAT you just might as well have white!

As far as workout time goes I will be working out every day if possible, skipping only Sunday if necessary. There is no reason that I cannot at least do a walking video every day.

I will be starting this boot camp on Friday of this week when I am able to get groceries. We are having a soup contest at our church Sunday, so I will also positively, absolutely, for sure, be taking that day off of the boot camp for that one day!

The reason I am doing this is because for the last few weeks I have been losing really slowly. It is good to lose slow, but honestly there is no reason I should not be losing one to two pounds a week, other than just being too lax in the routine. I am using this kind of as a tool to get me to 30 pounds, that is kind of a short-term goal for me at this point. At the end of two weeks I would like to have finally achieved a weight loss of 30 pounds. My total weight loss goal is 77 lb, so 30 lb would be a good portion of that total goal. It will also just be good to see how much of a difference it makes to eat nothing but healthy food and to exercise every day. And I'm not just talking about being active like I said in the previous post; I am actually going to be "working out" every day during this two weeks. I cannot wait to see what results this will produce!

One of the really, really great things about getting healthy is that I feel better about myself. I don't mean just because I'm looking better, I mean because I know that I'm taking care of myself and making good decisions each day. This has made me more confident in my ministry too. I used to have such a hard time singing at church because I knew that people would have to actually see me, and that really held me back because I was so ashamed of myself. Well, first of all, that was wrong! I know that our ability to minister is not based on how we look, but on how we allow God to use us, how we seek Him. But, not feeling bad about myself before I even get up there just gives me more freedom to allow him to use me. For too long I had my focus on the wrong place - on me, but now I am able to quit thinking "Oh, they are thinking I look horrible." I was always so afraid that by being overweight, that when people saw me they just thought I had no self-control. Honestly, I had no self-control! But, my weight didn't have anything to do with whether or not God used me, with whether or not he uses anybody. All he asks is that we are open and willing vessels for Him to work through. We need to remember that it is not about "us", it's about Jesus working through us to reach others for Him. And by the way, thankfully, I have some self-control now (it's important, fruit of the Spirit you know!)!

I am choosing to do this "boot camp" for my health. I talk about it on this blog to encourage others who are trying to do the same thing, and to help me to stick with it knowing I will have to talk about it. But, this is not my focus. My focus is on what I can do for Jesus to reach others. When we stand before God, it will not make any difference whether we weighed 100 lb, 200 lb, 300 lb, or more (it could quite possibly make a difference in our life span!), but it will make a difference how many people we told about Jesus, how much we shared the truth of His love. As a christian we have the hope of a perfect body one day, we have to make sure though that we are sharing that hope with everyone we meet. Each day should be a "boot camp" for Jesus too, not to see how many pounds we can lose, but how many people we can reach!

Everyday Teachers...Day 32

2008-01-30T09:47:00.000-06:00

Woo, it feels like I have not been on here for such a long time!!! I have been really busy and have not even kept up with my journal, so I am not going to try to catch up for the time lost. So there will be three days missing from my journal. I am starting at Day 32. Here is the latest...

January 29
B – Oatmeal
S – Spoon of peanut butter
L – Whole wheat pasta/sauce
S – Popcorn – tuna (not right at the same time)
S – Chicken pot pie YUM!!!
No workout

This morning when I went to do my workout (Day 33) my kids could not wait to do it with me! I did the Miracle Mile workout with Leslie Sansone, which is pretty fast paced, and we got to about three minutes into it and my 7 year old said "I'm tired, my legs are tired!" So he stopped and did other things. He came back for the push-up part. For some reason he thought that was big fun. I think the best part for him was probably laughing at my pain, as push-ups are about my LEAST FAVORITE thing to do!!! Anyway, my little girl hung in there with me and really had a good time, I think she thought it was like dance class or something. She said, "they're all wearing white shoes", so she had to run and get her white and pink tennis shoes out for her workout! When I took off my shoes because the mat work was coming up, she got a really sad look on her face and said, "oh, I really wanna take these shoes off!" It is fun to get your kids involved in your fitness goals. And it is so important that they see your example of healthy living every day. We cannot go around saying "I am so fat!" or talking about other people, "she is so skinny", because our children are learning from us. They are little sponges soaking up everything that we say. I used to talk that way and still have to watch it now, but my kids were picking up on it. I don't want my little girl to be ten years old asking me if she looks fat in her outfit. That would break my heart. I don't think my kids even have an ounce of fat on them. It amazes me how fit, how lean and muscular they are! And it is not from doing exercise videos, it is just from being active. We have got to be more active. Instead of me asking my son to please get the milk out of the fridge for me, I need to go get it myself. Instead of saying, "do you want to check the mail", I need to walk out there and get it. All of that activity really adds up at the end of the day.

You know we teach our kids so many important things. The most important thing that we teach our kids is about Jesus - teaching them to love God and serve God, teaching them that He loves them more than anything - teaching them to walk in love daily and live for God with everything that we have in us. But, we teach them many other things from day to day, we teach them how to treat people by how we treat people. We teach them how to talk to others by how we talk to them. We teach them how to be generous by letting them see us give to others. We teach them to take care of themselves, of their bodies, by how we take care of ours. We may not have a degree in teaching, but we are teachers nevertheless, and it's high-time we take that responsibility seriously!

Even if you miss your workout, maybe you don't have time for your video or time for the gym, take some extra time to be active with your kids. Go out and run around with them playing tag. Yesterday my kids and I played hide-and-seek, and it was so FUN! Just do something to get active. If you have to go to the store, park far away. Just because you miss your "exercise time" does not mean you have to sit down and veg-out. Get up and get moving. The important thing is to stay active!

A little progress...Days 27 and 28

2008-01-25T19:38:00.000-06:00

I don't know why I'm having such a hard time posting every day. I keep giving ya'll two days at a time. Sorry!!! Here is the update...

Thursday, January 24

B – Egg and Cheese wrap
S – None
L – Taco Bell – crunchy cheesy Gordita (or something like that! Steak instead of ground beef), steak and cheese taquito YUM!!!
S – None
S – whole wheat pasta/sauce, green beans, a little peanut butter
No workout

Now for today, I finally have lost another pound!!!!

WOOO HOOO!!!

For a grand total of

24 lb!!!

And I am still going...far from done yet!

So here is how today went:

Please keep in mind it was really, really busy day, so my schedule for my food was quite chaotic!

Friday, January 25

B – None
S – Spoon of peanut butter
L – whole wheat pasta/sauce/chs., English peas, piece of cheddar, five cheetos, few bites of apple S – Popcorn
S – Scrambled eggs, few bites of mac and cheese

Leslie Sansone walking video

I am very, very excited about making some progress again today, but I am not going to be writing any more tonight. My husband and I are both feeling pretty poorly, and have just taken some cold medicine, so I will be falling asleep at the computer if I don't wrap this up! Have a great weekend! Show the love of Jesus to everyone you meet!

Oh, and just a quick word before I go... When I started this back in November, it was hard to imagine me being 24 pounds down in January. It's so exciting. But there were times that I wanted to give up, that I didn't feel like I was doing any good or making ANY progress. I hung in there and now I have seen some really good results. So just remember to hang in there and keep going, small steps are steps nonetheless, and you will see results if you just keep on keeping on!!!

Counting the Cost...Days 25 and 26

2008-01-24T09:11:00.000-06:00

So here is the lowdown on the past two days, sorry for the delay, again...

Tuesday, January 22

B – Nothing early
Workout - Power walk with Leslie Sansone – YAY!
Brunch – Egg and Cheese wrap
L – Tuna w/light miracle whip, whole wheat pasta/sauce/
S – Lipton chicken noodle cup-a-soup
S – Tilapia filet (baked), English peas, whole wheat pasta/sauce, piece of cheddar

Wednesday, January 23

B – Egg and Cheese wrap
S - None
L – None
S – popcorn
S – Tilapia filet stuffed w/shrimp(baked), green beans, whole wheat pasta/sauce,
No workout...:-(

Still at 23 pounds down, no more weight loss yet. But I can tell such a difference in my clothes. Usually when I put my jeans on I have a bulge at the top hanging over a little bit. I put on a pair of those jeans yesterday and the waist was loose, and the pants overall were just fitting much better. I am really happy with the results. I just have to say that working out makes such a difference in your body!

Okay, now I have to just go to a really very serious note. I know this is a weight loss journal, but I just have to share this because I think it is really important:

I found an article in our local newspaper about a woman who had been missing in our area, and they had found her body. Well, I had heard that they were trying to find out who she was, and when I saw the article with her picture I realized it was someone I used to work with at a store about 12 1/2 years ago. At that time we used to talk quite a bit and our job and I had invited her to church. She came with me one time, but that was all. I moved away the following spring to Nashville, and did not see her for a very long time. When my husband and I moved back here I would see her at the grocery store, or in passing at other places, mainly just shopping was the only time I saw her. And in all of that time I never, ever invited her to church again. I never tried to talk to her about Jesus again. It absolutely broke my heart to see that she was gone, and I would never get that chance back. It was a loss I cannot even put into words. All of those times I had seen her, I had just been busy, just been focused on me, caught up in my own problems or own concerns, dealing with my kids in the store, etc. And I didn't take the time to talk to her, time to wonder how she was, time to tell her that Jesus loved her. I will never, ever get that chance back. I don't know what her life had been like, I just knew her from when we worked together. All I know is that I didn't take time for her, I only had time for me. I failed her.

I have kept the article from the newspaper, complete with her picture, as a reminder to me of the cost - the cost to Jesus as he walked up the hill to the cross, the cost for me as I take up my cross daily, and the cost of just one soul lost - something that can not be taken back. I don't get a do-over in this, and I will have to live with my failure in that. I was so upset and just wanted to beat myself up over it, but instead, I will just keep this article and pic, and remember that each person I see, each person I come in contact with, is my missionfield. I will make it my mission to reach as many people as I can, not worrying about what they may think or say about me. Our pastor told us this past Sunday that we are responsible for each person that we see, to tell them about Jesus. He said when we stand before God, and the lost are being called before the Judgement Seat, we don't want to hear them say, "But God, Aprille didn't tell me about Jesus. I saw her every day and I never knew I needed You in my heart." Because then God will turn to us and say, "Why didn't you tell them about me?" And we will have no excuse. There is no reason good enough to not share the love of Jesus, we should have all the time in the world to share Him, make time to share Him!. I am so heartbroken over people in other countries who never hear about Jesus, when people here need Him just as much!

Once again, I cannot say where this young lady was in here life - maybe she had already accepted Jesus. The point is that I didn't take the time to find out, the time to just ask her simply if Jesus was her Lord and Savior. Time is short and the need is great, it is our responsibility to share the love of Jesus. We never know when there will be no more chances, when it will be too late.

Less than Perfect...Days 23 and 24

2008-01-22T18:10:00.000-06:00

Whew! Sorry I haven't posted in a few days. Here is the catchup...

Sunday, January 20
B – White Chocolate Strawberry Yoplait Yogurt
S – None
L – Lobster delights, whole wheat pasta/sauce/chs., salad
S – popcorn
S#2 – filet of Tilapia, baked
S – Vegetable beef soup, serving of sandwich meat (ham/turkey), slice of cheese, few chips
MESSUP – PIE :0(
Workout – walked to the kitchen and back quite a few times during the day! LOL!

I had no morning snack, but had two in the afternoon - not the best idea, I know. The pie was such a terrible, horrible, devastating idea! I am on a fast - fasting sugar! HELLO! I really messed up. I kind of beat myself up over that because I felt like that was more of a spiritual failure, and I was so tempted to just eat more sweets to deal with those feelings. Instead, I confessed my mess-up to a friend (thanks Michelle!) and she said, "so, just get right back on it, move on." That kind of helped me to gather myself back together.

And you know what? That is just how God is too. We are so far from perfect. We can try and try, but it still seems that we mess up. And sometimes we just want to give up, we just think we can never reach what God wants us to be... But all the time, God is just wanting us to say, "I'm sorry God" and turn away from it, dust ourselves off, and move on in our walk with Him. Our God is so good. It is so good to serve a God that loves us more than anything!

Now, on to the next day...
Monday, January 21

B – Whole wheat spaghetti/sauce/chs. – I know it’s crazy, but I was craving it, it was actually
brunch!
S – None
L – Cheese pizza, few chips
S – popcorn
S – Lobster delights, English peas, mac & chs., pineapple
After supper mess-up – two chicken nuggets, sorry, but didn’t feel too awfully bad about that.
Workout – None

Really felt bad about not getting that workout. Knew I would pay today!

Just remember, and hopefully by posting this I will remember too, that if you mess up, don't give up! If you fall down, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get back on track. This is a marathon, not a sprint. These are lifestyle changes that we make in order to achieve long-lasting results. One mess-up will not ruin the hard work you have done, unless you decide to stay in that place and give up...

In a Hurry...Day 22

2008-01-20T08:11:00.001-06:00

I am trying to get ready for church, so just a quick review of yesterday for you...

B – None (coffee - is that a food group?)
S – None
L – sandwich (wheat/turkey, cheese, veggies), chips/dip
S – popcorn/spoon of peanut butter
S – Baked Tilapia, salad, whole wheat spaghetti w/ sauce and parm. chs.

Workout – Hip Hop Abs Total Body Burn

Getting a workout in today is really iffy, so I'll just have to see how it goes. My kids are coming home tomorrow from their grandparents' house, and I have much to do before then. I may need to workout just to find a little more energy!

Happy Sunday! Thank Jesus today for all He has blessed you with, most of all, for His love. Praise the Lord!

A Little Goes a Long Way...Day 21

2008-01-19T17:03:00.000-06:00

Well, another quiet, boring day at home... YEAH RIGHT!!!

I had a very nice anniversary with my hubby yesterday. We just stayed home, but the kids were at their grandparents' house and we had a quiet evening with a good supper, and just some good quality time with each other.

Then today we got up early and went to our church, we had a work day there. We were joking there about not needing to work out because we were getting so much exercise there, but I went ahead and worked out anyway. I'm really glad I did, it just feels great!

Here is yesterday's menu...

B – Wheat Chex /milk
S – Popcorn
L – potato salad (like half a cup) - two sugar free York peppermint patties
S – spoon of peanut butter
S – Beef enchiladas, salad

Workout – Hip Hop Abs Fat Burning Cardio
My weight did fluctuate up today, a little disappointing :0(

Okay, so I said on my previous post that I was allowing myself some of my chess pie for my anniversary. Well, it took a long time to get it right. I stuck it back in the oven two times before I finally got it cooked to the right conistency. It was delicious though, even before I got it right. I tried it last night in its nearly liquid form, but didn't actually get to eat the pie properly cooked until this morning. Let me tell you what, if you can get to where you skip sugar, just cut it out for a while, then when you finally eat some it doesn't take much - a little will go a long way. I ate two sugar free York peppermint patties yesterday, they are small, and it was SOOOO sweet - even though it was sugar free. A serving size for those is three patties for 80 calories. I was only able to eat two.

That is something I just have to stop and talk about just a minute before moving on. I used to just eat and eat a cake or pie or ice cream, or whatever, just for the sake of eating it! Sure, it was good, but after about two or three SERVINGS of it, it's enough to make you sick. Ya know? I have bought a box of Danish Wedding cookies, and really gotten nearly sick on them. That is nothing but pure binging. The point though to this is...just because the serving is 1/2 cup of ice cream, or one whole candy bar, or five cookies, or 20 chips, DOES NOT mean that we have to eat the whole serving size. Really take time with your food and enjoy it, listen to your taste buds before you keep packing it in! I knew after that second piece of candy yesterday that if I ate another one it wouldn't even be as good, not because it would taste different, but because I had satisfied the craving and that was exactly what my body was wanting, and I was ready to be done with it.

Case and point... I got the pie out this morning (Perfect, did I mention that???), and I started eating that, and let me tell you it was SO DELICIOUS!!! Really good stuff. But after a few bites I could have stopped, I was really done as far as my taste buds and my body went. But it was like I had this thought in my mind that "this is the last dessert I will be eating for a while", and it was like I went into panic mode and had to eat some more. I didn't really want it, I was just eating it purely for the sake of eating it. And guess what, I ate a few more bites, and I felt like I was going to be sick! Literally wanted to throw up!!!

So, just a word to the wise, think about what you're doing and stop before you hurt yourself!!! Someone told me once that the key was to get used to feeling just a little bit hungry. Not starving. But stop eating before you feel full. It feels so much better to feel not quite full, than to feel weighed down and bloated from your food. It saps your energy and just makes you want to lay down and take a nap.

Pay attention to your body and how you're feeling. Pay attention to your food, not to the TV, or paper, or whatever. You will find it easier to stop.

Enjoying your workout...Day 20

2008-01-18T11:02:00.000-06:00

So here it is, Friday, and I am so looking forward to the anniversary dinner with my husband when he gets home!!! I am fixing homemade enchiladas and chess pie for dessert. YUM! Not exactly low fat fare! So anyway, I didn't get my workout again yesterday, I know - that's heinous! But, as I write this on Friday morning I can say that have already gotten my workout in for today! YAY! Done and overwith!

B – 1 ½ tortilla (on the run)
S – None
L – Cocktail shrimp/cocktail sauce, whole wheat pasta/Prego/Parmesan
S – Popcorn
S – albacore tuna mixed with light Miracle Whip, one Minneola, and red skin potato salad (WOOO SO GOOD!)
Didn't do a workout :-(

It really pays to not got two days in between workouts if you can help it. Boy, it was tough on my lower back this morning when I worked out, like I was not very flexible. I will definitely try not to skip more than one day from now on!

Remember to keep your workout interesting and fun, change it up, so you don't get bored! Do some workouts that will be mainly aerobic and KICK YOUR REAR, but also just walk sometimes or do a walking video. If you're achy one day, maybe just do the walking video, something low impact to keep you active without causing you to hurt more! Whatever you do though, if it's not fun you won't want to keep it up, so HAVE FUN!!!

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND EVERYBODY!

Sticks and Stones...Day 19

2008-01-17T14:06:00.000-06:00

Today I am still holding steady at 23 pounds down. I did not get my workout in yesterday (Ugh!). However, there was birthday cake at church last night and I was barely even tempted. Tomorrow is my ten year anniversary with my hubby though, and I am making a pie for him, and will definitely have a piece of that! What is going to be hard is ignorning the pie as it stares at me from the countertop in the days following our anniversary. You know what I'm talking about, right?

So here is the way things went yesterday...

B – Yoplait Light Lemon Meringue yogurt (YUM!)
S – spoon of peanut butter
L – Mole wrap (turkey, mole, brown rice, wrapped in tortilla), a few chips and a slice of cheese
S – Tilapia filet stuffed with scallops & red peppers, whole wheat pasta/Prego/Parmesan, three or four mini pickles
S – 1 ½ tortilla (snack after supper instead of before)
No Workout

You will notice the addition of dairy back into the mix. Once again, the advantage of food journaling is that you have to look at what you're taking in, then you can make the changes necessary in order for your diet to be as nutritionally complete as possible. Well, in looking over my menus, I had noticed that I was not getting enough calcium. So, I bought myself some milk, and am eating yogurt and cheese during the day in order to get my three servings of dairy in for the day. I also have a calcium supplement here that I will be taking daily just to be sure that I am getting my recommended calcium each day. My mom has osteopenia, and I just accompanied her to get an MRI today because of bone/joint related problems, and I know it is very, very important to get that calcium into my body. I have never had a problem before because any time I ate something sweet I had to have some milk. But now that I have been skipping the sweets I have just not had much of a desire for milk, not even cereal. So, another change make to keep my eating HEALTHY! And as I've said so many times before, that is what it is about - not being the skinniest person around, not being the most beautiful or most handsome, but being healthy!

So my question to you today is..............................

Got Milk?

Having confidence...Day 18

2008-01-16T10:09:00.001-06:00

I had a really, really busy day yesterday and am almost ashamed to put my menu for yesterday on here. But the whole point is accountablity, so I will post.

B – Nothing
S – Nothing
L – Nothing
S – Popcorn
S – Weight Watchers Beef Stew frozen entrée (decent enough)

Workout – Tae Bo (Billy’s Favorite Moves) OUCH!

Okay, now that you have read that, I have to say that I absolutely do not condone missing meals, skipping meals, that sort of thing. I try to consistently eat five times a day. This is to keep my metabolism up so my body doesn't go into starvation mode, and by eating this many times I tend to not overeat at all. I stay less hungry overall. I was just really, really busy yesterday. My mom was here, we had stuff to do, and I didn't even realize until nearly 12:00 noon that I had not eaten yet. Then we had to rush to the store, and I was going to get something shortly after that, but again things were just too rushed. I came home and started trying to get the things done here that needed to be done, and ended up not sitting down until aruond 2:30 - I think - for a snack. I could have had lunch here, but I was starting to feel sick and just needed to hurry and eat. When I start to feel sick like that, then I don't want to eat at all, so I had to make myself eat the popcorn. Then I got busy again, doing more stuff around the house, and it got later and later. I knew I needed to work out, so I went ahead and did that first, and I think I ate supper some time after 10:00. It kind of all runs together now. I would have been fine to skip supper too, I just didn't want it, but I made myself eat it because it's NOT GOOD TO SKIP MEALS!!!

So, anyway, I'm down one pound today. But I will be eating normally again today, not like a bird!

What was really wonderful for me yesterday was that my mom said she could really tell now that the weight was coming off. She was so proud of me. It has been hard knowing that at the weight I started at if I lost 10 or 15 pounds you couldn't really tell it. So, now I'm at 23 pounds and it's starting to show!
I cannot say that I have not been discouraged through some of this time (as I have been working on this much longer than I have had this blog!), and I have felt at times like I wasn't doing any good. You know the feeling, "What's the use? I'm having the twinkie/cupcake/Butterfinger/Reese's/whatever..." But, the key as I've said before is small steps. And, like I said in one of my earlier posts, we have to remember that our worth does not lie in what we see in the mirror every morning. Our worth lies in Jesus. It is through his death and resurrection that we have abundant life and confidence, not because we have the best body or the best six-pack abs, or because we have the most beautiful face. What it all comes down to is that if we are the best-looking on the outside, but don't have Jesus in our heart and don't have our lives given completely over to Him, then we have nothing.

We are to be good stewards of what God has given us, including our bodies, but our bodies should never define WHO WE ARE! I have lived for too long being ashamed of who I am because of what I looked like. That is not living boldly for Jesus. I would go somewhere and just want to hide, hope as few people would see me as possible, and get back to my house where I was safe from people looking at me and what I had become. How could I expect to show the love of Jesus like that? And you know what else? I don't think badly of people because they're overweight, or anything else, and chances are, they weren't thinking that about me! And if they were, what does it really matter? My worth lies in Jesus.

All of our looks and the youth of our bodies is going to fade, so take care of yourself now, but know that all we will have in the end is Jesus. He will give us a new body and we will never be ashamed! Walk with your head held high, not haughty, but confident because we are "fearfully and wonderfully made"!!!

Still holding my ground...Day 17

2008-01-15T08:34:00.000-06:00

Ooo, I have been a bad girl. I did not work out yesterday. I had absolutely intended to, but it just didn't happen. On a good note though, I am still down 22 lb, will work out today - have to keep this progress going! Here is the menu from yesterday:

B – Popcorn, one piece of turkey (it was just so GOOD!), coffee – now if that is not a breakfast combo I don’t know what is, LOL!
S – baby carrots (raw)
L – Hot-n-spicy tuna and whole wheat bow-tie pasta/Prego/Parmesan
S – Lipton chicken noodle cup-a-soup
S – Brown rice w/ turkey mole (pronounced mol’A)
No workout (Bad, I know)

So that is the update, I'm kind of in a hurry, so no time to right more.

Healthy eating everybody, keep moving!

Progress...Day 16

2008-01-14T08:06:00.000-06:00

Yay! I'm down two more pounds today! It is so, so good to see some progress! Sundays are really active for me - I hardly ever get breakfast or the morning snack, but I'm usually pretty good about getting the rest of my food for the day. But yesterday I only got to eat a couple of times. I did not work out, but it was a very, very active day; I was moving a lot. Here is how the menu went:

B – None, but had some coffee
S – No morning snack
L – Turkey w/stuffing, mac & cheese, green beans, corn, and a roll (Woo, now that's a meal!)
S – No afternoon snack
S – Popcorn, few bites of turkey

I ate a big lunch, so I decided to opt for a much lighter supper, and there was no time for a snack. I took a day off of the workout, I really felt like I needed to do it and it would have obviously been beneficial, but I really got quite a bit of exercise just through my activity level yesterday. I am going to measure today and see what my total inches lost to this point are and will post later...

Have a fantastic Monday! Jesus loves you!

Small Steps...Day 15 (second post)

2008-01-13T15:45:00.000-06:00

I didn't get a chance to do an evening post yesterday to let you know how the day went, but here is the update:

B – Oatmeal and coffee
S – No morning snack

Workout – Tae Bo (Billy’s Favorite Moves)

L – Hot-n-spicy tuna, broccoli, and whole wheat spaghetti/Prego/Parmesan
S – Lipton chicken noodle Cup-a-soup and hot tea
S – Tuna kit (tuna/red cal mayo/relish/whole wheat crackers) and steamed veggies (broccoli, cauliflower and carrots)
S - Popcorn/fried peas and two pizza rolls

I know that was a lot of tuna and broccoli for the day, but I couldn't seem to figure out what I had a taste for, so I just went with something easy.

I did not have a morning snack and did not eat lunch until a little after 2:00, so I switched my morning snack to a p.m. snack.

I did the Tae Bo workout just to change up my workout again, which is essential to success in working out. If you do the same exact thing all the time, first of all you will get bored, second of all you're working the same exact things all the time - when sometimes you need to give other things more attention. One workout may focus on your abs, while another may put more attention on your legs, or arms. The boredom factor is really big for me. I have to change it up. Even walking - I like to change up where I walk if possible. Sometimes it is just not possible though, especially if you're going to a track or gym.
I was really excited about the workout I did though because the Tae Bo stuff can be really tough. Well, this was one of my workouts that I had bought, but had never actually tried to do. So it was brand new to me. Well, I noticed it was REALLY, REALLY FAST! I looked on the front of the box and it said "An Accelerated Workout." HA! That was not exactly what I was expecting, especially being so early into my fitness goals. I have a very long way to go, and I'm thinking while I'm doing the video - "this is so for skinny people". There is actually one part of the workout where you go from a standing position to a push-up, then jump back up to your feet. You only do that a few times, but needless to say at that point I just kept moving - I didn't do what they were doing there. The reason I was excited was because I actually made it through the entire workout ! WOO! I was so excited about that. I was beginning to think it would never end, but as soon as we started doing floor stuff I knew it was getting close to being done. It was tough, but a fantastic workout.

I felt great about the workout because I made it all the way through, but I was not always staying at their pace or able to do things exactly like they did it. The key is to hang in there, just to keep moving, it's not about getting it exactly right. We'll get there when we keep on and persevere. You can't climb a mountain in five or six great strides, you have to take small steps to get to the other side, to get to your goal. We just have to keep going and we will get there!

Just a quick note...Day 15 (morning post)

2008-01-12T08:28:00.000-06:00

Okay, I just wanted to give you all an update. Last night after I got done posting, I went and read my bible and got ready to rest for a little while, but then my son came in (he had almost been asleep) and asked if he could get in my bed, and then my daughter (who had been asleep) about one minute later came in and asked if she could get in my bed, and so I laid down with the kids and fell asleep, and there was no workout last night. I felt bad about that only because I had said on here that I was going to work out. So, I'm sorry for not following through last night.

But, on a better note, a much better note..............................

I AM BACK DOWN

TO A TOTAL WEIGHT LOSS OF

20 POUNDS!!!!

Okay, I'm a little excited about that. Wow, finally back down to 20 pounds. So far I have felt like I was just trying to catch back up to where I had gotten to before Christmas, but now I actually feel like I am making progress from this point. This is not my final post for today, I'll still do my end-of-the-day post, but I just had to tell ya'll about my weight loss. I'M SO EXCITED!!!

WOOOOOHOOOOOO! :-) Happy weekend everybody!

A get-up-and-go kind of day...Day 14

2008-01-11T20:35:00.000-06:00

I have had a really, really busy day today. It has just been go, go, go from the get-go, or the get-up-and-go, or whatever you want to call it. I have finally got a few minutes of quiet to sit and relax and have a cup of hot tea, it will be a short-lived quiet moment, but it is nice nonetheless.

I was very blessed today in that my parents bought Jordan and Noelle each a new pair of shoes, and they are so proud of their shoes! They are growing so fast, it is unbelievable! It seems overwhelming sometimes just how fast time is flying by...

I have not worked out yet today, it's just been too crazy, but after my supper settles I will be doing a workout - will tell you which one I did tomorrow - sorry for the delay...

Here is today's menu:

B – No time, but had some coffee
S – No time
L – Jr. Bacon cheeseburger with lettuce and ketchup/seven or eight French fries
S – bag of popcorn, one pickle
S – 1 fillet of Tilapia (baked w/lemon pepper), whole wheat spaghetti/Prego/Parmesan, five pieces of breaded popcorn shrimp

Workout - ?

Even though it is going to be late I am definitely going to work out. It just has made such a difference in the way I feel about my progress. Also, when I put my jeans on this morning I could tell it had really made a difference - my skinny jeans even (well, skinny for me!). So, I don't want to let exercise fall by the wayside again. I certainly don't want it to become an obsession either, to where if I don't work out a day I feel like I can't eat or like my body is going to swell overnight to the size of a giant boulder causing me to fall right through the bed! :-) J/K! I just want to do my best to exercise at least five days a week, even if it is just walking around our block. That is, of course, a LAST RESORT because it is so very boring!!! Anyway, keeping ourselves active is really going to make a big difference. It not only shrinks our body down to a healthier weight, but it makes us feel better too.

I am really looking forward to getting into the workout tonight as a good energy boost before I start my work tonight, but while my supper is settling and I have this quiet time I am going to give my bible a workout because my relationship with God is the most important thing to keep in the best shape possible.

Working out with spaghettios...Day 13

2008-01-10T22:06:00.000-06:00

Whew! What a day! It stormed like CRAZY here! And of course, I went to work out today and actually got out in it! What a mess. But it was so worth it, so worth it.

Now, I said in my last post that I was down one pound. That post was written for yesterday, even though I didn't get to it until this morning, but I am down one pound TODAY, not yesterday. And hopefully, maybe more tomorrow!

I decided to branch out this morning and have an actual breakfast food for breakfast - I know it's a far-fetched idea, but I thought I needed to break the monotony of popcorn for a day...Here is the menu:

B – Oatmeal/coffee/water

Workout – Hip Hop Abs Total Body Burn (Ouch - this was tough!)

S – Small salad/topped with ham and shredded cheddar – mix of honey French/ranch dressing
L – Chicken and broccoli stir fry with brown rice
S – Baby carrots
S – Baked potato with broccoli, butter buds, and fat-free sour cream

Now, I have not mentioned it before now, but my initials on the menu are B-breakfast, S-snack, L-lunch, S-snack, S-supper. I am sure you all knew that, but it just hit me that maybe that was not really making sense when you just see a letter, then a food.

Workout time was really, really good today - really tough, but really good. I like yesterday's workout better, but today incorporated weight training into the cardio making it harder, but also something very necessary to burn fat. So, I tried my best to make it through, and I WAS SUCCESSFUL!!! I made it, and I was so excited. Most of the time when I try a new workout I wimp out halfway through, but I am loving this Hip Hop Abs stuff. I didn't actually have any weights to work with today, or even a resistance strap, so I grabbed two cans of spaghettios out of Michelle's pantry and worked out like a champ! Boy, did I feel it.

Just a side note...this is a matter of personal opinion, so make what you will of it, but if you want cheese and you are trying to lose weight, eat cheese. Don't buy the fat-free stuff, it is HORRIBLE! It does not melt right, it is like rubber, and the taste is not satisfying when you are expecting cheese. So, don't waste your money, and more importantly - don't waste your calories - on something that doesn't even come close to tasting decent. That's from me to you, no charge.

I have to add this too, it's completely unrelated to weight loss. My kids were talking in the car today about what they had dreamed last night. My son told me his dream, and then my daughter decided to share hers. She said that her brother was in her dream with her and they were eating some candy, to which Jordan replied, "I wasn't in your dream, I was in my dream!" Apparently it's one of the lesser known rules of dreaming, that you can't be in more than one dream at a time! Jordan's logic is astounding isn't it? I just think it is precious!

On the move...Day 12

2008-01-10T21:59:00.000-06:00

I had a really good day yesterday. I am kind of behind in that I’m just giving the update today, but I’ll explain. A friend of mine sent me an email late Tuesday night inviting me over to work out. So Wednesday morning I was hurriedly working so I could get over there to work out on time. It didn’t happen, I was late, but better late than never right? I went to her house and we were planning on doing another walking video with Leslie Sansone, but I grabbed some of my workout videos on the way out the door - some of which have never even been out of the package!!! We got brave and did Hip-Hop Abs - Fat Burning Cardio, and talk about upping the intensity level. This workout was way, way fun, but it kicked our rears! It was awesome! I was sweating within about two minutes, but it was so fun! To me, it’s not even like really “working out”, more like “funning out”! After we got done she fixed all of the kids lunch and I fixed us some stir fry to top off our workout time with something healthy. It was so delicious!

Now my work schedule has been crazy, trying to work and homeschool and housekeep, etc., and so I’ve been up late, up early, up all night, you get the picture. So, after that workout I was really energized, ready to face the world, and cook some lunch. About a minute after I finished eating I basically hit a wall of exhaustion. I just felt like I had crashed and burned and would have liked nothing better than to just take a nap. Napping not being a possibility though, I was treated to a cup of French Vanilla coffee - wonderful! That helped out quite a bit and I was able to be productive for the rest of the afternoon, cleaning house, balancing the checkbook, etc. After we got home from church we had supper and I decided to take a nap before I went to work. I woke up to my son tapping me on the arm wanting to get in the bed. I got up and told him he could get in the bed, and I headed to the living room to get to work. I think it was 2:25 am. Some nap huh? So, I am just now writing about yesterday’s stuff today, but getting some sleep in my own bed last night instead of napping in between working, was just absolutely blissful!

Okay, so here is the menu from yesterday…
B – OR Naturals Butter Garlic popcorn
S – A few baked French fries
L – Chicken and broccoli stir fry with brown rice (OOOOO, so good!)
S – spoonful of peanut butter, a few raw carrots, two pickles
S – Hot-n-spicy tuna with whole wheat spaghetti/Prego/Parmesan

I felt really good about what I ate yesterday, and I got such a great workout that I’m going to be doing that again today. One great thing about the Hip Hop Abs workouts is that in using them I have a lot of different choices of workouts. The video (DVD) that we did yesterday actually had four seperate workouts on it. Then there is another one with, I think, three different workouts. And then there’s a video just for taking your workout to the next level as you get more advanced. It’s really cool. It may sound totally impossible, but after that one particular workout and a good day’s eating I could really tell such a difference in my body this morning! Maybe it is just my confidence level, I don’t know. I do know one thing though, it makes you feel so much better to be sure and get that workout in, and on top of that, we all know it makes us healthier. So, as good as it is to eat right, it is essential that we maintain a healthy level of activity, whether walking, bicycling, aerobics, or whatever, it just makes our efforts that much more effective!

Let’s get moving everybody!!!! Oh, and by the way, I’m down another pound - 19 pounds! WoooooooooHoo!

Facing up to ourselves...Day 11

2008-01-10T21:57:00.000-06:00

Well, today has gone really well. As part of my fast I have included TV, but got to see quite a bit of incidental TV due to being tuned in to the local weather all day. Thank the Lord we didn’t have very severe weather here. I am very tired today, and as a result I have had THREE CUPS OF COFFEE! Boy, that will get you going! When I type reports for the clinic, I have told my friends that it’s like my ears are connected to my fingers so they type what my ears hear, but my brain is free to do other things. My mind just absolutely races while I’m typing. It can be very annoying at times, having SOOO many thoughts going at one time. Anyway, I was typing today and my mind was going so fast, and it was because of all the coffee. I did space it out throughout the day. One cup in the morning, then another a little while later. And I have just now sat down with my third cup of coffee as I type this because as soon as I’m done I have to dive into more reports - and yes, it is 9:45 pm. Oh, to have a good night’s sleep. What must that be like???

So, here is the menu I had today…
B – Kettle corn popcorn
S – Lipton cup-a-soup chicken noodle
L – Hot and spicy tuna with whole wheat spaghetti/Prego/Parmesan
S – spoonful of peanut butter
S – Lobster delights, pickles, and a mini-bowl of shells-n-cheese with two spoonfuls of pork-n-beans

Not so good on the veggies right? Need to work more of that in tomorrow. I have started keeping a word document on my computer with my food listed for each meal on it because by the time I sit down to type the menus for the day it is sometimes hard for me to think about what I had (sad, huh?). This way, I can just copy and paste at the end of the day for your viewing enjoyment (LOL!).

Food journaling is a great idea because with every bite I take I know I have to write it down (type it) and make a record of it, and then post it on here for you to see. If we all would do this and then at the end of the day look at it, like I just did, and see what changes need to be made, it would be so beneficial. I can see at the end of today that I didn’t have enough dairy and didn’t have enough veggies. I had plenty of fiber and protein and water. But you know we eat our water too. So when we eat our fruits and veggies we get a lot of water out of those, and if I’m deficient in my body of those foods, that means I will have to drink more to equivocate it, and also that I will not have all of the right fiber I need. Yes, the whole wheat spaghetti is fiber and the popcorn, but I need more of the pickles, green beans, broccoli, apples, oranges, and things like that if I want overall health.

So write it down. You don’t have to show anybody like I do, but you do have to be ready to face it yourself. Taking the step to write down what we eat means having the courage to see the truth and to make the changes needed for our health.

When to say "when"...Day 10

2008-01-10T21:56:00.000-06:00

Today is the first day of our church’s 21-day fast. I am fasting sweets and TV. I wanted to start the no-meat fast, but had already bought groceries before we were told about the fast. Anyway, that is my plan. However, my anniversary falls on January 18, and it is my tenth anniversary, so I will be making an exception for our special occasion if necessary. There may not be any dessert involved, but then again, there may be!

Breakfast - my mom brought sugar free mini-muffins - I ate one for breakfast

Snack - spoonful of peanut butter

Lunch - Subway with my mom - turkey and ham on wheat with oil/vinegar, spicy mustard,
pickles, lettuce, bell peppers, tomatoes, and cheese (didn’t think at the time, but next time will probably leave off the cheese).

Snack - one mini-muffin (yes, again…)

Supper - lobster delights, english peas, whole wheat spaghetti (I know that’s a weird combination, but my family was having pizza and I had to eat something quickly before I was overtempted!)

So, I have already started today. I don’t have much time to write today as my reports are piling up, but will tell you more tomorrow. And by the way, the muffins were on my menu because my mom brought them over - and they were pretty good, even though they were sugar free. I just don’t normally eat them.

And in closing, here is a quick word to make you not want to overeat…

Proverbs 23:20 NIV
“Do not join those who drink too much wine or gorge themselves on meat, for drunkards and gluttons become poor, and drowsiness clothes them in rags.”

That makes me want to say “when”…

Fast, anyone?...Day 9

2008-01-10T21:55:00.000-06:00

I really want to be transparent with you, which is why I have done this journal, and I want to give good news - all the time. I guess that is silly. I need to keep it real! Right?

Well, this morning I have to say I was a little aggravated. I was up a pound today and I ate really well yesterday. UUGGHHH! Oh well. I’m not going to let it get me down, but I need to buckle down really hard apparently. Maybe the way I’m eating now is maintaining my weight, but not really helping me to lose. Everyone plateaus at some point or another, I guess I just hoped it would be a little bit further down the line before that happened.

So, what do you do when you hit a plateau??? Well, you make changes…I don’t think they have to be drastic, huge, overwhelming changes. I think that just a little tweak in your metabolism, a little change in the food you take in, can help. My water intake is great, no problems there. I might drown if I drink more, seriously! My exercise program is very inconsistent though. I’ve got to get a better handle on that. Exercise is a must for a healthy lifestyle, not just to lose weight, but for cardiac health, just overall health in general. And, exercise is so beneficial to our mood. When we exercise, endorphins are released in our body. That boosts our mood, gives pain relief, etc. So, not really a down side to exercise unless the doctor has told you not to do it!
Next, I’m eating really good, but I have as few veggies as possible. Another “must change”! Not really a down side to eating veggies either really. I don’t even think a doctor would tell you not to do that!

So, with these changes in mind and getting this plan into action, I’ll see what progress I make.
Oh, and our pastor has called our church to another fast. He asked us to fast whatever we wanted to, and so I am going to be praying about that today and tonight, and will post tomorrow what my fast will be.

You know, God is so awesome! We think we are so smart, but he has wisdom we will never understand. People fast to give that extra time to God, to spend time with Him, to say “I’m willing to give this up and press in to see this need met, or to go to the next level - the next dimension with God”. And now, there are studies being done because according to statistics it is believed that fasting is related to better cardiac health! Wow! All this time we thought when we fasted that it was just us having to go without something. But, it is actually healthy for us to fast! I think that is so, so cool that something that God would have in His word for us to do would be good for us. Surprise, huh? There should be no surprise to it! God only wants what is good for us, and will never tell us to do anything that will harm us.

Joel 1:13 NIV (A Call to Repentance)
Put on sackcloth, O priests, and mourn; wail, you who minister before the altar. Come spend the night in sackcloth, you who minister before my God; for the grain offerings and drink offerings are withheld from the house of your God, 14 Declare a holy fast; call a sacred assembly, summon the elders and all who live in the land to the house of the Lord your God, and cry out to the Lord.

It doesn’t matter how healthy you are physically, if you don’t have a healthy relationship with Jesus. I guess what I’m trying to say is that most importantly we should seek God and strengthen our relationship with Him, and the rest of our life will line up with His word. When we are living for Him, seeking Him, and spending time with Him every day, then our lives will bear the fruit of his Spirit - love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Did you see that last one? SELF-CONTROL! Wooo, I need a little more fruit of the Spirit!

Goodbye to fads - Hello health!…Day 8

2008-01-10T21:54:00.000-06:00

Wow, I feel great today! Woo, one headache gone and a good night’s sleep, and I’m good to go today. It is 11:22 am and I have already done all of my errands for today and am ready to get busy at home. I feel like I have gotten a really good workout in because of all the walking I have done and hauling groceries, etc. I made sure I didn’t park too close to the stores I had to go to, so I would have to get some walking in that way, and I MOVED - I tried to really pick up the pace and walk quickly when I could. Sometimes the aisles are not exactly made for that sort of thing, so I just did the best I could. But I feel really fantastic right now. Yesterday I only actually ate one meal - lunch - a club sandwich and french fries, followed by a dessert of two Reese’s Hearts. I know that is not exactly health food, but I don’t feel too bad about it since that was the only meal I ate! However, I did close out the day with a soda, and when I weighed this morning I was not down any, even after eating so little yesterday.

So, I have gotten quite a lot of exercise today, and will probably still do the walking video this afternoon at some point, if nothing else just to give my arms a good workout!

My husband had requested chicken and dumplings tonight for supper, and for anybody who knows me - that is my weakness!! I cannot eat them without binging! I have really been working on exercising some self-control, but I don’t feel a need to overtempt myself. I called a friend this morning and told her about the upcoming meal, and she was very encouraging. She said she had stepped on the scale this morning and had not lost any more weight, and that did not feel good. She reminded me that if I ate the C&Ds I would feel yucky, that’s besides the fact that they are probaly one of the worst things that I could eat while trying to lose weight! She said that there was no food that she could eat that would make her feel as good as seeing her weight come steadily down. And she is so right. So, tonight while my family eat chicken and dumplings and cornbread (starch, anyone?), I will be eating chicken and broccoli stir fry - fried in olive oil cooking spray so as not to add any more fat! I love that, and it will make me feel better, and keep me from even giving those dumplings a second glance. So just remember that those Reese’s hearts may taste really good, that Dr. Pepper might seem really refreshing, the brownie might really be gooey, and that cake is probably really, really moist and chocolatey, but none of it will make us feel as good as stepping on the scale tomorrow morning and seeing progress, another pound down, maybe more.

I guess with me, I just got fed up with fad diets and worrying about dropping 40 lb in a month, etc., and now am only interested in living a healthy lifestyle, not a quick fix. That one pound down, is in fact a pound down. And just think, if you only lost one pound a week for an entire year, that’s 52 pounds lost by the end of the year. When you think about it that way, it seems almost easy to live a healthy lifestyle! So here’s to making good decisions every day, and if you mess up one meal - don’t go and eat a dozen donuts out of guilt, just make the decision that your next meal is going to be healthy. There is no reason that healthy can’t mean delicious either, because it can be really, really delicious! And if you do mess up that one meal, maybe walk an extra time or two around the block or vacuum the house to burn some calories. One mess-up is no reason to go back to being unhealthy. This is a way of life, not a fad! Hang in there!

…am I awake? Zzzzzz…Day 7

2008-01-10T21:53:00.000-06:00

I will not be saying much today, this is the first time today I’ve had time to sit down and write - and it’s nearly 5:00 pm! I did not even get to step on the scale today, so a day off from that for me I guess. I have had a migraine for most of the day, and I took Aleve first, then some sinus medicine a few hours later. I don’t know if you have this experience or not, but when I take medicine on an empty stomach, then I go and eat, it’s almost like the food activates the medicine and boosts its efficacy. Has anyone experienced that? Anyway, I took some sinus medicine, then ate my first meal of the day around 2:00 pm - I had to force myself to eat because by head was really making me feel sick - and boy, by the time I got done eating I was feeling really yucky - out of it kind of yucky - like my head was too heavy for my body. My headache is gone, but now I’m kind of numb, walking around in a hazy fog, and I’m having a hard time even making my fingers type the words I’m thinking! So, I guess that’s all for today, sorry it’s not more exciting, but I’m sure I will feel better tomorrow!

Rolling right along...Day 6

2008-01-10T21:52:00.000-06:00

Wow! I am so excited this morning after stepping on the scale! I am now back down to a total 18 pound weight loss, still two more just to get back to where I was before Christmas, but I’m getting there!

Here is how yesterday went…

Breakfast - bowl of rice with butter buds (these melt on moist, hot foods just like butter - I don’t care for them on popcorn), artificial sweetener (one pack), and cinnamon. I was in the mood for a rice pudding, and this was pretty close, just without the milk. It was okay, but nothing I will crave for sure. Definitely not the same as good old fashioned rice pudding.

Lunch - cocktail shrimp with sauce and whole wheat spaghetti/Prego/parmesan (surprise, surprise!)

Snacks - first snack was Corn on the Cob popcorn - a buttery DELIGHT!, and second snack was a mug of Lipton noodle soup

Supper - Rotisserie chicken, mixed greens (cooked - not salad), au gratin potatoes, and one and a half Hawaiian rolls. Delicious!!!

I had a couple of cups of coffee, a cup of hot tea, and loads of water.

I did the walking video - felt like I had lifted weights because it has such a good workout for your arms in it!

All in all, it was a good day, and I’m looking forward to another great one today! When I packed my husband a big old brownie in his lunch today, it just wasn’t as tempting when I know I’m making progress! However, I will say that if I am craving something really bad - such as a piece of cake or a donut or cookie (not likely) or cake (did I mention how much I like cake?) - then I will allow myself to have a portion of that treat. A serving, not two or three servings! If we deny ourselves constantly when we are trying to take the pounds off, and don’t allow our bodies the things that we are SOOO craving, then one day we will BINGE. If I don’t allow myself that piece of cake I might just one day go crazy and eat half of the cake! I love Danish Wedding cookies (Keebler), and there was a span of about a week where I went to the store a couple of times and got a box of those cookies, and I hid them in my house, and I didn’t just eat a couple for a good snack, I ate until they made me sick. No, I didn’t literally get sick, but I felt horrible. Supercrash for my body! So allow yourself a treat once in a while, I know I will!

Hide the Rotel...Day 5

2008-01-10T21:51:00.000-06:00

I just have to say that I am soooooo thankful that the holiday season is over! I love this time of year, it is beautiful and fun and wonderful. I love all of the get-togethers, and unfortunately…I love the food. Yesterday my husband was off work for New Year’s, and I fixed him some Extra Spicy Rotel with Hot sausage in it. I ate it twice! I didn’t eat it with chips. I just grabbed a tortilla out of the fridge, heated it for about 8 seconds in the microwave, rolled it up, and dipped it! YUM! I had two tortillas like that yesterday. NAUGHTY! NAUGHTY! NAUGHTY! And now, the rotel is just sitting there in the fridge, calling me across the kitchen, reminding me of how tasty it was! UUUGGGHHH! I will be strong today. Today is not a holiday, and I am back to normal! Needless to say I didn’t lose any more weight from yesterday today. I know that I will not lose every single day, but I did make some really bad choices yesterday (I mean how can I expect to lose weight eating Rotel and tortillas???), and didn’t exercise to boot.

Today’s exercise video is called Easy Steps - A Walking Weight Loss Program - it’s 20 minutes. If you have never tried these walking videos, they are fantastic. I normally do the ones that Leslie Sansone has out such as Miracle Mile - a christian based workout (fantastic), or really any of her different walking videos. By the time you get done with them you have walked the equivalent of one mile, two miles, even up to four miles I think. But you don’t just walk, you do leg lifts, kicks, knee lifts, work your arms, it’s really good - and boy, do you feel it! I check out my videos at the library, since I have not actually bought one of the walking videos yet. And since I check them out at the library I try to alternate the ones I get so other people can use them too, even though I would like to just keep that Miracle Mile out for a whole year!
So, here’s to a better day today. I’m about to start it with a cup of hot tea - I’m craving it right now - complete with caffeine! The main thing for me to remember is that this way of living is one step at a time, one day at a time. Some days are gonna be messed up, they’re not going to be my best, but I just have to pick up the next day and get back on track. The key is perseverance!

I have to say too that many times when I’m hungry I need to just go read my bible. That time spent with God is very satisfying and keeps me on the right track. God wants us to be healthy. Our bodies are a temple, and we only get this one. If we mess it up by not taking care of it, there’s not going to the store to get a new one, or going to the shop to get a replacement part, or whatever. We have to be faithful and good stewards of what we have, of what God has given us.

Well, that ought to give me a good kick in the rear today!

Happy New Year...Day 4

2008-01-10T21:50:00.001-06:00

January 1, 2008
WooHoo! Down another pound today! Steady decline, that’s what I like to see… as far as weight goes anyway! I was a little scared to step on the scale this morning after our church service last night. We ate late, and it was not what you would call a healthy buffet. Here is how yesterday went…

Rice for breakfast - cup of coffee too

Bag of popcorn for a snack

Lipton Noodle soup - two big mugs full for lunch

Coconut cake for a snack (not the best choice of course)

late night supper consisting of two small sandwiches that maybe amounted to close to one normal size sandwich made with two plain slices of bread, two or so servings of chips, two cocktail sausages - that’s only because they were the last two, I so could have eaten more! And, of course, a diet Pepsi.

I’m so excited about what this new year is going to bring! Things are really exciting at our church, I know that God is really gonna do great things with our church! I’m getting healthy, and that is not a New Year’s resolution, as I have been working on this since last year! There is just so much to look forward to, and I want 2008 to be the best year of my life so far! It did make me a little bit sad though when I came out of church last night around 12:30 or so, and there is a place across the street called “The Entertainment Complex” which is a club, and it was packed. It was so packed that people were parking in our church parking lot to go to it, and the surrounding business parking lots! During our church service when we were praying we could hear the music booming from across the street, they were having a big New Year’s party themselves. It just made me so sad because people will go to a party like that and drink, and who knows what, and maybe not even remember what all they did, but it is so hard to get them to come to church. We had an AWESOME party at our church, and I’m not talking about the games or food, or even the music, but we were in the presence of the King of Kings. You could feel the presence of God so, so powerfully in the service and there was real freedom there. Sometimes we were dancing or shouting or laughing or crying, and it was so amazing. That time brought us closer to God, and gave us time to bond with one another, and time to pray for others who are suffering while we celebrate. I just cannot say how amazing it was. I just wish that all of the people across the street at a different kind of party could have come in a different direction, and could have gone through a different door - one that led to Jesus, and not to sin. I guess that my biggest hope for myself in the coming year is that I will reach as many people for Jesus as I possibly can, and realize that we may only have one chance to reach each person, maybe one last chance to touch those around us with the love of Jesus. We never know when it will be too late.

More of the same...Day 3

2008-01-10T21:49:00.001-06:00

December 31, 2007
Here is just a quick overview of what I had yesterday…
Breakfast was skipped due to getting ready for church. I had a BIG cup of coffee!
Lunch - I had a junior bacon cheeseburger from Wendy’s, and a bowl of whole wheat spaghetti with Prego and parmesan (get used to this entry!) Sugar free HP drink mix
Snack - bag of microwave popcorn (butter garlic - UMMMM!), after I finished this I had a cup of Candy Cane lane hot tea (super YUM!)
Supper - Half pack of sweet and spicy tuna and (you guessed it) a bowl of whole wheat spaghetti/Prego/parmesan.
Where I went wrong was that I made Mitch a cake and totally cleaned the bowl, the beaters, the spoon - you know what I mean! This cake consists of white cake mix, sweetened condensed milk, cool whip, and coconut. I was up really late and I ate a little bit of cake (that I made for Mitch - I had to see if it was good. Then I had about eight peanut M&Ms with 1 tbsp of peanut butter - not good. I also had a little bit of rice at supper time, forgot to mention that!
Thankfully, I got a lot of walking done at Wal-Mart and EW James yesterday! My weight is still the same today. No progress, but stable. After the way I messed up last night I have to be happy that I didn’t go up!
I made the rice last night to try to eat for breakfast in the mornings, not brown rice, but sticky white rice. I had some this morning, but it feels a little bit heavy. Not sure if that is going to work or not.

On my way...Day 2

2008-01-10T21:47:00.000-06:00

December 30, 2007
First of all, let me just start by saying that there is MUCH to be said for water weight!!! I lost five pounds from yesterday until today. Can you believe it? FIVE POUNDS!!! That is 1/4 of my total weight loss so far. WOW! On Friday night I made a pot of Lipton Noodle Soup - no chicken - so it is almost completely broth. But, if you check out the sodium content on the package, it is unbelievable! So Saturday when I weighed I felt horrible - because I was up so much. Then yesterday, i was more careful. Lots of water, hot tea, and some coffee, and this morning I was down five pounds.
We, as unique people, have to do unique things in order to achieve success for our health. What works for you may not work for me, and vice versa. I am able to eat with my family, but eat something completely different from them. For instance, if my family is eating a meal that consists of cheeseburgers and french fries, baked beans, whatever, I will sit there with them and eat a Boca burger - which is very decent (not excellent, but pretty tasty) and will eat french fries - but baked - maybe even a baked potato. If they are eating spaghetti, I will eat it also, but will have whole wheat spaghetti. I have a friend who is not able to take this approach. She is not able to eat differently than her family and has to manage her weight differently. I am writing this journal, not to say this IS THE WAY TO DO IT, but to say “this is what is working for me, and it’s okay to tailor-make your own plan of what works for you.”
Another thing that works for me is weighing every day. If I’m up a pound or two I can adjust my eating accordingly for that day. I can also think about what I ate the previous day, as it might just be water weight. This way I don’t let myself get out of control with my eating. For some people this approach does not work and will drive them crazy! The key for me is to not let myself get in a funk about it if I am up a little bit. I just have to keep working to bring it down.
The following foods are staples, absolute MUST-HAVES in my house for my consumption - (my husband does not care for this list!):
Whole wheat spaghetti - at all times there must be a bowl of cooked spaghetti in my fridge!
Popcorn - does not matter what kind, butter, kettle, natural, whatever
Tuna - this is a must-have for anyone’s weight loss regimen. If you add tuna into your diet, you will lose weight. I can eat tuna salad, tuna fillets, or those new flavored tuna packs that you don’t have to drain (hot and spicy is my fave!). Also, tuna lunch kits come in really handy when you’re in a hurry, and they are really tasty. I had never had one of those until this past September, and it has turned out to be a real lifesaver for me.
I said tuna, but any kind of fish has to be on hand - tilapia is really good too, it’s very mild. I don’t like fishy fish - tuna is the exception.
I do not keep cokes for me in the house. If I need a coke, I will stop and get a diet drink just for that time, and usually don’t even finish it, I normally give it to my kids. I get really tired of water though, so the singles drink mixes work fantastic for me. I especially like the Hawaiian Punch Sugar-free mixes - $1.00 or less for a box of 10. I can use one packet for 32 oz of water - i think it says only 16 or 20 on the box, but it’s pretty strong stuff. I also like Crystal Light - there are so many different kinds, but I really just like the basic iced tea flavor, or pink lemonade.
Brown rice - this is not generally eaten alone because I like some flavor with it.
Broccoli florets - if I’m gonna eat broccoli I can do without all of those stalks! Stores usually carry their own brands that are pretty cheap for this sort of things. Try not to skimp on your veggies, they’re hard enough to eat as it is - might as well be good!
Carrots - usually baby carrots since these are easy to thrown in a cup and eat at my desk or in the car, whatever…
Stir fry mix - I get Beef and Broccoli stir fry mix in a little yellow pack - can’t remember what brand it is. Use one pack of chicken of your choice - I prefer boneless/skinless tenders or breasts (1 lb or so), and 1 pack of frozen broccoli (1 lb or so). It’s so easy to make, quick and delicious!!! i use the brown rice to go with the stir fry, and I can pretty much bet on losing weight after eating that for a day or two. It’s super-healthy.
You will find in this journal that I can eat spaghetti for just about every meal of the day. I used to get the cheap sauce just thinking it was okay. But, I must say that now PREGO is the only sauce for me. I told my husband I am absolutely ruined because I have to have Prego now. A meal with whole wheat spaghetti, Prego, and parmesan cheese gives you - fiber, veggies, and dairy - YUM! I prefer to leave the meat out on that.
My main struggle as far as meals go is breakfast. I am not really much of a breakfast person because things upset my stomach really easy in the morning. So some days I just eat popcorn, or skip it all together. If you have any suggestions for an easy-on-my-stomach breakfast, please send them!
Also, the hardest time for me to control my intake is when I’m overloaded with reports, and am having to stay up late, or all night, or getting up in the wee hours of the morning. Serious seratonin chaos for me. So, if you have any suggestions for me on staying awake without eating one of everything in my kitchen on the hour every hour, please let me know!

Getting ready...Day 1

2008-01-10T21:45:00.000-06:00

December 29, 2007
Wow, I finally got a blog spot! I’m so excited! This is a huge and SCARY step for me to start this weight loss journal, but I think it will help me to know that someone might read it, so I’ll make better decisions for my health and be somewhat more accountable.
I will not give my start weight at this point, but you all know what I look like, and that should be enough to be getting on with. I started a fast back in November (not a “no food” fast, but a “only healthy food - no sugar” fast), and I had lost a total of 20 pounds. However, over Christmas, I have put some of that back on. I have gone to the store and gotten the staple foods that I need in my house to help me to eat right, and am ready to get started. I am starting today (even though I have messed up by eating some M&Ms) to get back on my healthy eating regimen. Also, I use a lot of videos for exercise, and will be listing the different ones with each blog, so that you can see what I’m doing. I have tried going for walks with my kids, but they get really tired of it really fast - my daughter cried for an entire lap around the track! I can do outside stuff with them just here at home to stay active, but it is really hard to gauge just how much I have accomplished through that. Please feel free to give me tips and chide me when necessary!
Here goes…